Warped Quantum - the only mathematically minded and quasi-scientific guild in all of Godville, the forefront in investigating gameplay mechanics as well as tips and tricks. We also offer free dead cats to anybody who brings us either a millisecond pulsar, a quantum gravity gradiometer or a high-temperature superconductor. Animal-rights activists will be directed to the nearest laser-testing facility.
So what's the fuss? In this world, knowledge is power and power is force multiplied by distance over time. New knowledge is even more powerful, but less easy to learn. The philosophy of this guild is summed up by its motto: Omnia vero incerta sunt. This translates literally as "In truth, all is uncertain" and demonstrates the might of the guild, for it shows that the members are in possession of the great secrets. It also shows the members' superb grasp of Latin. The guild cares not for the personality of its members, for the guild masters are tolerant and understand the insignificance of such things.
Warped Quantum meetings are held at a mystical place which is always on the edge of the de Sitter horizon, known as the tavern. The same can be said for funerals and any other gatherings. In the tavern it is customary to down superfluous amounts of beer, squirrely temples and until recently, Spode's experimental cocktails (they were banned due to undesirable side effects). The unofficial motto is actually "To the Tavern!" and as a result, members are rarely seen outside the place. Pets, too, enjoy drinking beer at the tavern, resulting in many stumbling beasts falling asleep on the floor which then trip up anybody walking past. This eventually caused a new section in the tavern to be opened: the Warped Quantum anti-proton p[et]-bar.
Like other guilds, we have a Guild Council conference chat (not related to the guild council listed below) which all members can join in with. However, members who decide to spam and foul up the place are liable to be expelled immediately, and without hope of being let back in.
The Recognition Symbol: In order that guild members may be recognized in pantheons, active members should add the guild recognition symbols to their motto. Just copy and paste this symbol: [ ☢ ]. This is the hazard symbol for ionising radiation. Radiation is only understood by members of the guild so this is an apt symbol for us.
The Warped Quantum Guild landing page has a full member list as well as additional stats: http://godvillegame.com/stats/guild/Warped%20Quantum
The Quantum Sages
The Guild Council
- and his Hrun, Guild Founder & Universal Chronicler - creator of experimental beer with interesting side-effects, agnostic about nihilism
- and his Ryzea, Rider of the Photons - perpetual wearer of beer goggles
- and his Mescalin, Devourer of Quarks - lives under a rock which has a precisely-defined momentum, frequent tavern visiter
- and his Rocket, Laser Tweaker - usually too busy meddling with our lasers to visit the tavern, and a temple owner!
- and his Sir Nonnaly, Quantum Capacitor - unknown variable in the formula for quantum flux
The Particle Theorists
The Guild Officers
- and his PinguPenguin, Accelerator Technician - overseer and analyst of numbers, often gets lost coming home from the tavern
- and his Feedhead, Quantum Mystic - harbinger of doom
- and her Yulian, Spectroscope Designer - sensor of misdeeds (NO BULL)
- and his Syphliss, Quantum Drum Beater - entertainer at wave functions, and host of harmonic oscillation parties.
- and his Dufusdfgh, Whirler of Galaxies - apologist for dark matter.
- and his Drogadreerm
- and his Striden
- and his Stormknight
- and his Avarose
- and his Ryphes
- and his Bennet
- and her Devil138
- and his Gillroy
- and his Ensign Garak
- and his Catharines
- and his Carakticus
- and his Wunomia
- and her Bugga-boo
- and his Apocalyptica
- and his Leapster
- and his Kitty Killer
- and his Grawlisdeath
- and his Peter Manglethwaite
- and his Winston Thomas
- and his Blammergeier
- and his Lord Ravenshire
Q-points and WQ-puzzles
These points are extremely difficult to acquire, since the only way of earning them usually is to solve a Warped Quantum puzzle, which are set byunless otherwise stated (If you think you have thought up a good maths/physics/logic puzzle let him know but it must not be available anywhere else on the internet). There are at least two puzzles of varying difficulty for Warped Quantum members in each set. You may only attempt one of the problems from a given set. Each puzzle is worth a certain number of points (depending on difficulty) to the first person to solve it (working out must be shown). Members of other guilds may post their answers only after a week has elapsed since the puzzle was posted, at which point they may gain q-points (thereby becoming honorary WQ members). Q-points may on occasions be given out for special reasons too. All WQ-puzzles are given in the section below this one. Here is the current scoreboard for Q-points:
The Table of Geniuses
Warped Quantum Puzzles
February 22, 2012 Puzzle
- Puzzles set by . Part 1 was solved by on Thursday, March 1, earning him 1 Q-point. Part 2 was solved by on Saturday, March 3, earning him 1 Q-point.
- Part 1 Answer: The four digits were 3243 in base 10, which spell "cab" in base 16. ("Cab" is a synonym for "taxi.")
- Part 2 Answer: 8 sprays.
October 31, 2011 Bonus Puzzle
- Bonus puzzle set by . It was solved by on Sunday, 27 November, earning him 1 Q-point. Note: this puzzle is available on the internet, but this was not known at the time. However, the puzzle policy has since been updated to prevent this (all puzzles must now be completely original).
- Answer: 5200 km. Incidentally, the radius of the earth is actually around 6400 km.
September 25, 2011 Puzzle
- Although a few people got extremely close, the third part expired after 42 pages in the forum thread had been added (it got busy) on 22.2.2012 so the answer has been revealed below.
- Answer: 1.64 * 10^20 seconds.
- The second part of the Warped Quantum puzzle of Sunday, 25 September was solved on the same day that it was released, by , earning her 2 q-points! The first part was then subsequently solved by earning him 1 point.
- Answers for part 1 (on that day): $2,167,278,490. $688.24.
- Answer for part 2: 3,133,843.6L
July 4, 2011 Puzzle
- The third part of that puzzle expired and the answer was revealed:
- Answer: 0.162 (3sf) seconds.
- 1st part of Warped Quantum puzzle Monday 4th July 2011 was solved by for 1 point. 2nd part was then solved by who therefore received 2 q-points plus another point for the extra credit answer.
- The answer to part 1 was 10 and the answer to part 2 was 9/10 with the extra credit being given for proving that the probability of getting free beer became higher when you were not in the tavern.
- Members of other guilds may now attempt the warped quantum puzzles, and may therefore also gain q-points. However, they can only begin to attempt the puzzles a week after the date listed at the top of the puzzle.
June 13-20, 2011 Puzzle
- Second part of 13 June to Monday 20th June puzzle solved by (gain 2 q-points). then solved the first part to gain one point.
- For the first part, answer was 965. The answer for the second part was 37 minutes.
June 12, 2011 Puzzle
- The first ever Warped Quantum Weekly Puzzle of 12th June 2011 was quickly solved by (who receives 3 points for showing proof) and (who gets 2 points for getting the answer but not showing how.)
- The answer was D but if π is rounded to the nearest integer, you get 3/6 = 1/2 so A was the runner-up answer so well done (you get 1 point). The format of the puzzle will now change.
The Chronicles of Warped Quantum
Entries are added in reverse chronological order.
- Temple owner earned his thousandth gold brick on day 707 g.e. and became a
- Day 680 g.e. In the Godville Times
- Hrun - 56th-level adventurer, member of the “Warped Quantum” guild, with the motto “☢ Don't even bother ”, stands at the 4th position in the pantheon of gratitude under the vigilant supervision of the god Spode. His worst enemy - a Hunny Bear. Favorite trophy - something that looks like the other cheek. He is also a huge fan of Beerburgh’s pubs.
- Day 655 g.e. In the Godville Times
- Carakticus - 41st-level adventurer, member of the “Warped Quantum” guild, with the motto “ ☢ Om Ah Hung, baby! ☢”, stands at the 4th position in the pantheon of creation under the vigilant supervision of the god DrOg. His worst enemy - a Reverse Engineer. Favorite trophy - something that looks like a horseshoe from a spherical horse. He is also a huge fan of Beerburgh’s pubs
- Day 613 g.e. In the Godville Times
- Sir Nonnaly - 32nd-level adventurer, member of the “Warped Quantum” guild, with the motto “☢ The cake is a lie!”, stands at the 48th position in the pantheon of gratitude under the vigilant supervision of the god Nonnal. His dream is to master the “teeth gnashing” skill and then offer lessons in exchange for gold bricks.
- Day 605 g.e. In the Godville Times
- Sir Nonnaly - 31st-level adventurer, member of the “Warped Quantum” guild, with the motto “☢ The cake is a lie!”, stands at the 47th position in the pantheon of gratitude under the vigilant supervision of the god Nonnal. His worst enemy - a Bulletproof Monk. Favorite trophy - something that looks like a two-eyed paper clip. He is also a huge fan of Godvillewood’s pubs.
- Day 513 g.e. In the Godville Times
- Sir Nonnaly - 17th-level adventurer, member of the “Warped Quantum” guild, with the motto “☢ The cake is a lie!”, stands at the 31st position in the pantheon of story tellers under the vigilant supervision of the god Nonnal. He was known to distribute counterfeit Godville invites during his youth.
- New points system implemented, as copied from Guild Name (with permission). The Warped Quantum Weekly Puzzle is introduced.
- Day 368 g.e. In the Godville Times
- Ryphes - 19th level adventurer, member of the “Warped Quantum” guild, with the motto “DEMACIA!!!”, stands at the 62nd position in the pantheon of destruction under the vigilant supervision of the god Aeson. He thinks that a Non-Pierced Caps Lock slow roasted in its own juices is one of the finest delicacies that Anville has to offer.
- Day 347 g.e. In the Godville Times
- Hrun - 41st level adventurer, member of the “Warped Quantum” guild, with the motto “☢ Away from Godville!”, stands at the 2nd position in the pantheon of gratitude under the vigilant supervision of the god . His worst enemy - a Shaggy Vogon Poet. Favorite trophy - something that looks like a mystery box. He is also a huge fan of Deville’s pubs.
- It seems that a new town has been revealed to us all - Deville. We wonder what other new towns have just been created.
- We are now allies with the League of Adjudicators. A happy time for Warped Quantum as we spread knowledge of our existence across the land. For some reason, their members are acting with excessive joy. It is recommended that you learn this irrational behavior quickly in order to fit in. We also found a mysterious box on the doorstep. we X-rayed it, T-rayed it and ultrasound scanned it just to make sure, and found an odd collection of friendship bracelets, seemingly a token of friendship. They are now being handed out for all to wear, rejoice members!
- Day 342 g.e. In the Godville Times
- Hrun - 41st level adventurer, member of the “Warped Quantum” guild, with the motto “☢ Away from Godville!”, stands at the 2nd position in the pantheon of gratitude under the vigilant supervision of the god . All he ever wanted was a little love and affection.
- Day 288 g.e. Godville Times
- Hrun - 37th level adventurer, member of the “Warped Quantum” guild, with the motto “To Dogville!”, stands at the 2nd position in the pantheon of gratitude under the vigilant supervision of the god . His worst enemy - a Bulletproof Drop Bear. Favorite trophy - something that looks like a weakest link. He is also a huge fan of a San Satanos’s pubs.
- We reached number one in the pantheon of unity on the 18th January 2011. Celebrations ensued.
- Day 237 g.e. In the Godville Times
- "Vote for renaming the “Warped Quantum” guild into the “Warped Quantum Premium” is completed. Counting of the ballots is complicated by the laziness of committee members from the “Through Time and Space” guild."
- Unfortunately for the person who proposed the change, he was the only one who wanted it and nobody voted in his favour. The name therefore stays the same.
- We now have new allies (Knights who say Ni) and have also declared war with their enemies (Wiki Leagues).
- Look out for our new artifact, scheme of b-quark decay!
- Day 228 g.e. In the Godville Times
- "A malicious mathematician, who perverted postulates of the probability theory, has finally been caught. From now on, all events should be regarded as equiprobable."
- We give a special shout out to those brave souls who succeeded in stopping him, and we are especially glad that our theories continue to stand the tests of time. Omnia vero incerta sunt.
- Help us in our campaign to wipe out the 'Quantum Woo'!
- Quantum woo is the description for a phenomenon where many crazy beliefs are justified by an obfuscatory reference to quantum physics. Usually this is a focus on some sort of "energy field", "probability wave", or "wave-particle duality" that magically turns thoughts into something tangible that can directly affect the universe. This concept is pushed notably by such things as the Law of Attraction or Quantum healing. When an idea seems too crazy to believe, the proponent often makes an appeal to quantum physics as the explanation. Apart from confusing people, it places false ideas in their minds about something which is essentially advanced mathematics.
- Permission granted by "Guild Name" founder on October 30, 2011.
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