Warped Quantum - the only mathematically minded and quasi-scientific guild in all of Godville, the forefront in investigating gameplay mechanics as well as tips and tricks. We also offer free dead cats to anybody who brings us either a millisecond pulsar, a quantum gravity gradiometer or a high-temperature superconductor. Animal-rights activists will be directed to the nearest laser-testing facility.
So what's the fuss? In this world, knowledge is power and power is force multiplied by distance over time. New knowledge is even more powerful, but less easy to learn. The philosophy of this guild is summed up by it's motto: Omnia vero incerta sunt. This translates literally as "In truth, all is uncertain" and demonstrates the might of the guild, for it shows that the members are in possession of the great secrets. It also shows the members' superb grasp of Latin. The guild cares not for the personality of it's members, for the guild masters are tolerant and understand the insignificance of such things.
Warped Quantum meetings are held at a mystical place which is always on the edge of the de sitter horizon, known as the tavern. The same can be said for funerals and any other gatherings. In the tavern it is customary to down superfluous amounts of beer, squirrely temples and until recently, Spode's experimental cocktails (they were banned due to undesirable side effects). the unofficial motto is actually "To the Tavern!" and as a result, members are rarely seen outside the place. Pets too enjoy drinking beer at the tavern, resulting in many stumbling beasts falling asleep on the floor which then trip up anybody walking past. This eventually caused a new section in the tavern to be opened; the warped quantum pet bar.
The Recognition Symbol: In order that guild members may be recognized in pantheons, active members should add the guild recognition symbols to their motto. Just copy and paste: ☢ This is the hazard symbol for ionising radiation. Radiation is only understood by members of the guild so this is an apt symbol for us.
The Quantum Sages
The Guild Council
- and his Hrun, Guild Founder & Universal Chronicler - creator of experimental beer with interesting side-effects, agnostic about nihilism
- and his Gathelios, Quantum Tuneller - has the habit of randomly popping in and out of existence
- and his Ryzea, Rider of the Photons - perpetual wearer of beer goggles
- and his Mescalin, Devourer of Quarks - lives under a rock which has a precisely-defined momentum, frequent tavern visiter
- and his Rocket, Laser Tweaker - usually too busy meddling with our lasers to visit the tavern
The Particle Theorists
The Guild Officers
- and his PinguPenguin, Accelerator Technician - overseer and analyst of numbers, often gets lost coming home from the tavern
- and his Kaylai, Superconductance Regulator - creator of all temporal bumps
- and his Talman Fleigh, Fission Engineer - guardian of the e-tavern and organizer of quantum parties
- and her Yulian, Spectroscope Designer - sensor of misdeeds (NO BULL)
- and his Sir Jonothon, Quantum Harbinger - chief chronographer
- and his Lord Macintosh
- and his Drogadreerm
- and his Adzy
- and his Jokers revenge
- and his Feedhead
- and his Striden
- and his Stormknight
- and his FalleN
- and his Avarose
- and his Ryphes
- and his Aboopheenthyo
- and his Bennet
- and her Devil138
- and his Gillroy
- and his Divaghan
- and his Dewald
- and his Ensign Garak
These points are extremely difficult to acquire, since the only way of earning them usually is to solve a warped quantum puzzle. There are at least two puzzles for warped quantum members which vary in difficulty. You may only attempt one of the problems from a single set. Each puzzle is worth a certain number of points (depending on difficulty) if you are the first one to solve it (working out must be shown).members of other guilds may post their answers only after a week has elapsed since the puzzle was posted and then they can gain q-points (honorary WQ members). Q-points may on occasions be given out for special reasons too. Here is the current scoreboard:
The Table of Geniuses
The Chronicles of Warped Quantum
- 1st part of Warped Quantum puzzle monday 4th july 2011 was solved by for 1 point. 2nd part was then solved by who therefore received 2 q-points plus another point for the extra credit answer.
The answer to part 1 was 10 and the answer to part 2 was 9/10 with the extra credit being given for proving that the probability of getting free beer became higher when you were not in the tavern.
- Members of other guilds may now attempt the warped quantum puzzles, and may therefore also gain q-points. However, they can only begin to attempt the puzzles a **week** after the date listed at the top of the puzzle.
- second part of 13 june to monday 20th june puzzle solved by Goodey (gain 2 q-points). Wolf Spirit then solved the first part to gain one point.
for the first part, answer was 965. The answer for the second part was 37 minutes.
- The first ever Warped Quantum Weekly Puzzle of 12th June 2011 was quickly solved by Goodey (who receives 3 points for showing proof) and shesgotdajack (who gets 2 points for getting the answer but not showing how.)
The answer was D but if π is rounded to the nearest integer, you get 3/6 = 1/2 so A was the runner-up answer so well done Wolf Spirit (you get 1 point). The format of the puzzle will now change.
- New points system implemented, as copied from Guild Name without permission. The warped quantum weekly puzzle is introduced.
- Day 368 g.e. In the Godville Times
Ryphes - 19th level adventurer, member of the “Warped Quantum” guild, with the motto “DEMACIA!!!”, stands at the 62nd position in the pantheon of destruction under the vigilant supervision of the god Aeson. He thinks that a Non-Pierced Caps Lock slow roasted in its own juices is one of the finest delicacies that Anville has to offer.
- Day 347 g.e. In the Godville Times
Hrun - 41st level adventurer, member of the “Warped Quantum” guild, with the motto “☢ Away from Godville!”, stands at the 2nd position in the pantheon of gratitude under the vigilant supervision of the god Spode. His worst enemy - a Shaggy Vogon Poet. Favorite trophy - something that looks like a mystery box. He is also a huge fan of Deville’s pubs.
It seems that a new town has been revealed to us all - Deville. We wonder what other new towns have just been created.
- We are now allies with the League of Adjudicators. A happy time for Warped Quantum as we spread knowledge of our existence across the land. For some reason, their members are acting with excessive joy. It is recommended that you learn this irrational behavior quickly in order to fit in. We also found a mysterious box on the doorstep. we X-rayed it, T-rayed it and ultrasound scanned it just to make sure, and found an odd collection of friendship bracelets, seemingly a token of friendship. They are now being handed out for all to wear, rejoice members!
- Day 342 g.e. In the Godville Times
Hrun - 41st level adventurer, member of the “Warped Quantum” guild, with the motto “☢ Away from Godville!”, stands at the 2nd position in the pantheon of gratitude under the vigilant supervision of the god Spode. All he ever wanted was a little love and affection.
- Day 288 g.e. Godville Times
Hrun - 37th level adventurer, member of the “Warped Quantum” guild, with the motto “To Dogville!”, stands at the 2nd position in the pantheon of gratitude under the vigilant supervision of the god Spode. His worst enemy - a Bulletproof Drop Bear. Favorite trophy - something that looks like a weakest link. He is also a huge fan of a San Satanos’s pubs.
- We reached number one in the pantheon of unity on the 18th January 2011. Celebrations ensued.
- In the Godville Times: Day 237 g.e. " Vote for renaming the “Warped Quantum” guild into the “Warped Quantum Premium” is completed. Counting of the ballots is complicated by the laziness of committee members from the “Through Time and Space” guild."
Unfortunately for the person who proposed the change, he was the only one who wanted it and nobody voted in his favour. The name therefore stays the same.
- We now have new allies (Knights who say Ni) and have also declared war with their enemies (wiki leagues).
- Look out for our new artifact, scheme of b-quark decay!
- In the Godville Times:
Day 228 g.e. "A malicious mathematician, who perverted postulates of the probability theory, has finally been caught. From now on, all events should be regarded as equiprobable."
We give a special shout out to those brave souls who succeeded in stopping him, and we are especially glad that our theories continue to stand the tests of time. Omnia vero incerta sunt.
- Help us in our campaign to wipe out the 'Quantum Woo'!
Quantum woo is the description for a phenomenon where many crazy beliefs are justified by an obfuscatory reference to quantum physics. Usually this is a focus on some sort of "energy field", "probability wave", or "wave-particle duality" that magically turns thoughts into something tangible that can directly affect the universe. This concept is pushed notably by such things as the Law of Attraction or Quantum healing. When an idea seems too crazy to believe, the proponent often makes an appeal to quantum physics as the explanation. Apart from confusing people, it places false ideas in their minds about something which is essentially advanced mathematics.
|Warped [Quantum] Humour|