User:Tlazolteteo

From GodWiki
Revision as of 00:28, 5 July 2017 by Tlazolteteo (talk | contribs) (Mentions in the Godville Times)
Jump to: navigation, search
Deities of Godville
Tlazolteteo 
las_amiguitas_de_coatlicue__by_ah_puch_zegno-d6lkgdg.png
Hero Chutzpahtl
Personality Up to interpretation
Gender 4× Female
⚜️Guild 
Guildy Pleasures


Divine Origins

Tlazolteteo is the collective embodiment of four Aztec goddesses of love and desires. Depending on the context, this could be interpreted positively (marital love and fertility) or negatively (debauchery and depravity). If you ask her though, the interpretation that is arrived at is more reflective of the viewer than of herself.

Mentions in the Godville Times

Having received numerous verbose prayers from her hero Chutzpatl about his overly voluminous Chronicles, Tlazolteteo finally caved and offloaded the chapter of newspaper mentions onto here.

Newspaper Mentions (45 so far)

Longest streak: 7 days in a row

  • Day 1932 g.e. “Rumor has it that Tlazolteteo submits especially good ideas and votes for the submissions of others.”
  • Day 1960 g.e. (for ER contributions)
  • Day 1961 g.e. “Warning: Tlazolteteo is busy in the ER, enhancing ideas left and right!”
  • Day 1975 g.e. “Tlazolteteo says that she and her friends enjoy sitting in the air conditioned Enhancement Room. Oh yes, and improving ideas. That too.”
  • Day 2004 g.e. “Cotzbalam: leader in innovative ideas since… yesterday.”
  • Day 2006 g.e. “Tlazolteteo finds improving ideas an incredibly painful chore, but, as a masochist, she promises to continue to do it.”
  • Day 2008 g.e. “Apparently, every entry that Tlazolteteo simply looks at in the ER becomes three times better.”
  • Day 2022 g.e. “Tlazolteteo was spotted in the Ideabox. All ideas are requested to form an orderly line and await improvement.”
  • Day 2037 g.e. “Let’s celebrate Tlazolteteo and her devotion to helping our ideas be all they can be.”
  • Day 2057 g.e. “Warning: Tlazolteteo is busy in the ER, enhancing ideas left and right!”
  • Day 2076 g.e. “An honored ER frequenter, Cotzbalam, claims that improving ideas is not painful really.”
  • Day 2080 g.e. “Tlazolteteo finds improving ideas an incredibly painful chore, but she promises to continue to do it.”
  • Day 2083 g.e. “Tlazolteteo has been busy in the ER. She doesn’t care much about idea quality, but she does love to meddle with things.”
  • Day 2087 g.e. “An honored ER frequenter, Tlazolteteo, claims that improving ideas is not painful really.”
  • Day 2088 g.e. “Tlazolteteo says she loves the ER too much to go a single day without visiting. Sometimes she even visits twice a day.”
  • Day 2109 g.e. “Let’s celebrate Tlazolteteo and her devotion to helping our ideas be all they can be.”
  • Day 2112 g.e. “Warning: Tlazolteteo is busy in the ER, enhancing ideas left and right!”
  • Day 2118 g.e. “Tlazolteteo says she loves the ER too much to go a single day without visiting. Sometimes she even visits twice a day.”
  • Day 2131 g.e. “According to reports, honored ER contributor Tlazolteteo makes everything better. Especially new ideas.”
  • Day 2166 g.e. “Sources report that Tlazolteteo has been prettying up phrases in the ER for brighter, funnier, happier Godville.”
  • Day 2186 g.e. “Tlazolteteo has been busy in the ER. She doesn’t care much about idea quality, but she does love to meddle with things.”
  • Day 2194 g.e. “Eyewitnesses say that Tlazolteteo was spotted working in the Enhancement Room. Woohoo!”
  • Day 2243 g.e. “Tlazolteteo has been busy in the ER. She doesn't care much about idea quality, but she does love to meddle with things.”
  • Day 2321 g.e. “Cotzbalam was spotted in the Ideabox. All ideas are requested to form an orderly line and await improvement.”
  • Day 2344 g.e. “Tlazolteteo says she loves the ER too much to go a single day without visiting. Sometimes she even visits twice a day.”
  • Day 2372 g.e. “Tlazolteteo finds improving ideas an incredibly painful chore, but, as a masochist, she promises to continue to do it.”
  • Day 2407 g.e. “An honored ER frequenter, Tlazolteteo, claims that improving ideas is not painful, really.”
  • Day 2415 g.e. “Tlazolteteo says that she and her friends enjoy sitting in the air conditioned Enhancement Room. Oh yes, and improving ideas. That too.”
  • Day 2448 g.e. “Tlazolteteo brings out the best in her own ideas and those of others.”
  • Day 2455 g.e. “Eyewitnesses say that Tlazolteteo was spotted working in the Enhancement Room. Woohoo!”
  • Day 2456 g.e. “Eyewitnesses say that Tlazolteteo was spotted working in the Enhancement Room. Woohoo!”
  • Day 2457 g.e. “There is an opinion that Tlazolteteo should get some credit for her content enhancements yesterday.”
  • Day 2516 g.e. “Tlazolteteo was spotted in the Ideabox. All ideas are requested to form an orderly line and await improvement.”
  • Day 2518 g.e. “Sources report that Tlazolteteo has been prettying up phrases in the ER for a brighter, funnier, happier Godville.”
  • Day 2529 g.e. “Tlazolteteo says that she and her friends enjoy sitting in the air conditioned Enhancement Room. Oh yes, and improving ideas. That too.”
  • Day 2532 g.e. “Apparently, every entry that Tlazolteteo simply looks at in the ER becomes three times better.”
  • Day 2533 g.e. “Tlazolteteo says she loves the ER too much to go a single day without visiting. Sometimes she even visits twice a day.”
  • Day 2534 g.e. “Sources report that Tlazolteteo has been prettying up phrases in the ER for a brighter, funnier, happier Godville.”
  • Day 2535 g.e. “Cotzbalam finds improving ideas an incredibly painful chore, but he promises to continue to do it.”
  • Day 2536 g.e. “Let's celebrate Cotzbalam and his devotion to helping our ideas be all they can be.”
  • Day 2537 g.e. “Tlazolteteo says that she and her friends enjoy sitting in the air conditioned Enhancement Room. Oh yes, and improving ideas. That too.”
  • Day 2538 g.e. “According to reports, honored ER contributor Tlazolteteo makes everything better. Especially new ideas.”
  • Day 2541 g.e. “Cotzbalam was spotted in the Ideabox. All ideas are requested to form an orderly line and await improvement.”
  • Day 2557 g.e. “It's reported that Tlazolteteo can improve ideas even with her eyes closed.”
  • Day 2572 g.e. “Improving ideas is Tlazolteteo's raison d'etre.”
  • more to come...

Did you spot a newspaper mention for Tlazolteteo? Send her a PM!

Ideabox Contributions

Total Submissions: 809

Approved Submissions: 99

Approval Rate: 12.2%

Approved Ideas

  • Bug reports: 5
  • Corrections: 22
  • Diary: 24
Submitted Entry
07/13/15 Rushed off to find a doctor to treat my injuries, but all I found were copy-editors and pundits. Wait, I think I'm in the wrong ER.
07/20/15 Saw a baby %random_monster% holding a piece of candy so I stole it. Judging by the angry growling coming from behind me, this may have been a bad idea.
07/22/15 My prayers must've reached the heavens, as it started raining beer inside the temple. I must hurry and help drin... I mean clean up this mess.
07/23/15 Taught the %monster% an important lesson in letting go by prying this %artifact% out of its cold, dead hands.
07/27/15 Love the smell of fresh rain on the open fields. This dank scent emanating from %pet_name% though, I could really do without.
07/31/15 Helped %monster% overcome its mid-life crisis by ending its life altogether. Was offered a lovely %artifact% as thanks.
08/07/15 Last thing I remember: I had found a fruit basket at your temple, so I tried to send you a pineapple by tossing it up to the heavens. How did I end up in the hospital, %rg%?
08/07/15 Saw a newborn %monster% hatch from its egg. Darn, now it thinks I'm its {dad│mom} and won't leave me alone. Better get rid of it before the parents show up.
08/20/15 Came across two bridges at a river crossing: One with a toll, one with a Troll. Chose the free option and charged ahead with weapon ready towards the tollbooth.
08/20/15 %monster% has been really upset ever since I dislocated a few of its limbs. I don't get why it's gotten so bent out of shape over this.
08/24/15 Unearthed an ancient stone golem with veins of gold tracing towards its torso. I smashed its core apart with my weapon and found a golden brick inside!
08/24/15 I've gotten really good at climbing the ladder of success, but I can never resist riding down the fun chute whenever I reach the top.
08/27/15 The surgeon replaced my injured colon with a new semicolon, and noted that my regular bathroom routine may become a little punctuated.
09/20/15 Dug a majestic moat around a farmer's outhouse and ran away before he came out.
09/24/15 A cartwright busily repairs a broken axle on a wagon, while an eager merchant waves me over, anxious for some business during the downtime.
10/05/15 Your wish is my command — Too bad I'm not a genie, or you could have actually gotten what you wanted.
11/25/15 A heavenly beam restored %pet_name%'s youthful looks. I, unfortunately, am still bleeding profusely.
01/12/16 Saw a coyote hold up a sign saying “%god_phrase%” before it plummeted down a cliff's edge.
06/23/16 A mushroom cloud erupted from a hilltop and morphed into the words, “god_phrase”.
09/08/16 Paid %gold% for a magical pet-training potion that I can spray at %pet_name% whenever he does something bad. This is going to be fun!
12/09/16 Heard a monk grumble, “%god_phrase%.” It's amazing what you can overhear when people think you've dozed off.
01/17/17 Sitting here watching %pet_name% sleep, wondering how I ended up on watch duty...
02/01/17 Channeled all my happy thoughts into the %monster% until clouds of rainbows and glitter erupted out of its ears.
02/01/17 A lit candle appeared above my head as I suddenly thought of a better way to %quest%.
  • Earthly News: 3
Submitted Entry
07/10/15 Watching %pet_name% scent-mark every single milestone along the way...
08/02/15 Boosting the local economy through beer purchases...
08/12/15 Hammering the refresh button to find out if {his│her} attack landed or not...
  • Duels: 19
Submitted Entry
07/20/15 %boss%'s eyes clouded with overconfidence and unleashed an epic 27-miss combo. While it was stunned at seeing its target still alive, %defender% jammed a marble up its nostril.
07/20/15 %attacker% tossed a hand mirror to {his│her} opponent, who fumbled the catch. The mirror smashed to pieces, and %defender% suffered (%dmg% of) bad luck damage.
07/21/15 %boss% consulted its “How to Serve Heroes” cookbook, and proceeded to slice-and-dice %defender%.
07/30/15 The Judge spotted and confiscated a prohibited weapon from %attacker%, and ordered {him│her} to go to the corner and face the wall.
08/01/15 %hero% didn't quite catch that last command, so {he│she} knelt down and prayed for an instant replay.
08/02/15 %attacker% checked that {his│her} liquor license was still valid, then served %defender% a spiked fruit punch to the face.
08/02/15 %attacker% tried to poke %defender%'s eye via telekinesis, but aimed poorly and gave {him││her} a nosebleed instead.
08/05/15 %attacker% shoved a bacon-wrapped, deep-fried cheesecake into {his│her} adversary's salivating mouth. %defender%'s heart exploded with joy, and saturated fats.
08/13/15 Right before %boss% bit into an exposed leg, he saw %defender%'s tattoo declaring {he││she} may contain gluten, nuts and dairy. %boss% jerked his head back in revulsion.
08/13/15 %boss% wasn't sure if his last attack connected, so he gave %defender% the benefit of the doubt and struck a second time.
08/13/15 %boss% charged recklessly towards %defender%, but suddenly froze on the spot when he noticed a nearby squirrel.
08/13/15 %attacker% thought {his│her} heat ray vision was working, but %defender% was merely experiencing hot flashes.
08/13/15 %attacker% was stumped as to what action to take next, so {he│she} used one of {his│her} lifelines to ask the audience instead.
08/24/15 %attacker% turned on the waterworks. %defender%'s heart was flooded with a deluge of sympathy, along with considerable water damage.
08/24/15 %attacker% pulled a rabbit out of {his│her} headgear and hurled the rabid beast at the foe. %defender% suffered vicious bites and started foaming at the mouth.
09/11/15 %attacker% tried to impress %defender% with some knockout humour, but forgot to deliver the punchline.
09/20/15 Colours momentarily faded from the world as a quick time event started. Unfortunately, %defender% failed to keep up and got badly slashed by %attacker%.
10/15/15 %attacker% reported {his│her} opponent for excessive exacerbation. %defender% was penalized by an outraged judge who thought that it meant something else.
11/18/16 %attacker% chucked an ice pack at %defender%'s head to cool off h{is er} hot temper.
  • Dungeon: 0
Submitted Entry
  • Quests: 9
Submitted Entry
08/21/15 figure out where the blind are leading the blind (epic)
09/09/15 break the record for most records broken
09/16/15 count how many steps it takes to wear out a pair of shoes (epic)
10/19/15 go soul searching in a cemetery
11/02/15 outwit the other voice in your head
01/14/16 liberate a captive audience
01/27/16 catch a bloodmage red-handed
01/28/16 convince the smoking gun to quit smoking
05/16/16 erase the finish line
11/07/16 unlock the next quest area
11/07/16 spot a glitch in the deja vu simulator
11/14/16 make an emergency landing on a flight of fancy
11/18/16 hit the snooze button on the fire alarm
11/28/16 round up a triad of squares
01/20/17 pull the swordfish out of the stone
  • Quest Endings: 1
Submitted Quest Ending
05/17/16 extinguish the eternal flame Sealed the eternal flame inside Schrödinger's box. Now it's both burning and extinguished.
  • Monster: 13
Submitted Entry
09/13/15 Perverse Engineer
09/23/15 Blunderachiever
10/26/15 Kryptoknight
10/29/15 Groove Robber
11/25/15 Misinterpretive Dancer
12/14/15 Adminitraitor
12/26/15 Discordion Player
01/05/16 Hired Mussel
01/27/16 Snowball Fighter
08/18/16 Awkwarg
09/07/16 Blood-curdling Whale
11/05/16 Cyborganic Chicken
11/18/16 Subconsciencious Objector
  • Artifact: 12
Submitted Entry
07/24/15 massage-in-a-bottle (@)
09/14/15 subject-verb agreement
09/14/15 fingerprint magnet
10/06/15 random lumber generator
10/14/15 medicine-flavoured fruit
01/30/16 award-winning award
02/26/16 pack expansion slot (@)
03/01/16 cooties vaccine
03/05/16 cheat codex
04/25/16 jar of pre-counted beans
05/16/16 hostile makeover kit
05/18/16 spirit guidepost
  • Equipment: 2
Submitted Category Entry
01/27/16 talisman religious cymbal
10/25/16 talisman technobauble

(last update - Stats: Nov 23, 2016 - Approvals: Mar 24, 2017)

Favourites

  • Favourite Rejected Ideas
Submitted Category Entry
07/10/15 Diary, while traveling Sensed something intimately familiar from a smoldering piece of clothing near a campsite. Turned out to be the lingering scent from an old flame.
07/21/15 Duel, for exploding bosses Saw the %boss% start to glow red, and knew my job was done. I turned my back and walked away, 'cause cool hero{│in}es don't look at explosions.
07/29/15 Diary, wasting gold in town Invested %gold% in the global stork market, but an abrupt change in the earth's magnetic field sent all the storks crashing. How depressing.
07/31/15 Diary, for evil heroes When I saw %pet_name% do something stupid just now, I almost wanted to throttle him. This must be how you feel all the time, %rg%.
04/21/16 Diary, while traveling While I was taking a whiz, %pet_name% took a bite out of my wiener. I really should’ve known better than to leave my barbecue grill unattended like that.
08/17/15 Quest investigate who scribbled “REⱭЯUM” on the tavern door
12/28/16 Quest quell a pheasant uprising
08/14/15 Monster Deckard Canine
09/10/15 Monster Wire-fu Master
09/10/15 Monster Mind Filleter
10/29/15 Monster Disarming Slime
12/16/15 Monster Supremacist Court Judge
03/03/17 Monster Notorious P.I.G.
10/14/15 Artifact JAMMED CAPS LOCK
06/24/16 Artifact Newtonian fig