The Goddess LisaAlexandra and her Heroine Daughter, LisaAlexandra
The Goddess LisaAlexandra fell in love with a mortal man and she brought him to her heavenly court. A fellow god cautioned her these actions were against the laws of the gods and the punishment could be the death of her beloved mortal man. Although it broke her heart, she banished the mortal from her court to keep him safe. This hurt him so he vowed to never return again.
Little did the mortal man know that now they shared a child, and the Goddess LisaAlexandra lovingly named her LisaAlexandra in her image. She selfishly hid her child with all her might from the other gods but when her daughter was in her adolescent years her existence was discovered by some of the other gods who became jealous and the Goddess was forced to send her daughter to live and hide among the mortals. Perhaps fate will bring together the young LisaAlexandra and her father. And when they unite, he will undoubtedly see his image in her face and find the true meaning in her name.
As young LisaAlexandra matured in the land of the mortals, she had a very troubled existence. Although at first glance one might mistake her for a human, a better look would reveal her quality that gave her away as a decedent of a Phoenician Goddess - her strikingly beautiful red wings. Since she is unlike any being she has yet met in these vast lands, the demigod has run into much prejudice and little acceptance or peace. She has sustained serious injuries from being attacked from behind when mortals have mistaken her for a monster or a large Phoenix bird that they undoubtedly wanted to capture as a pet. To avoid all of these hardships, she now attempts to conceal her wings in a cramped fashion under a cape and avoids spending time near humans who might appear to intend her harm. At times she has reached out to some humans who seem kind at first but often those friendships end in jealousy, fear of what she really is or those who might want to selfishly profit from her, which has only left her with a broken heart. Her mother has spoken so kindly of mortals so surely one day she should meet some of these good people she has heard about. She longs to know her father since of all mortals, he surely would be the most accepting of what she is and love her as most fathers love their children.
LisaAlexandra took the job as a heroine to give her the ability to travel far and wide in her search for her father. This was also an easy career choice since she already had a goddess which was part of the job description and it gave her more chances to please her mother and feel her mother's love. Every time her Mother sends her encouragements her heart is filled with warmth and she feels the strength to continue on her quests. Having that motherly connection is special to her since she misses her childhood, hiding and playing in the goddess' court and often finds this mortal land to be lonely and cruel.
And so The Heroine LisaAlexandra for a not so long time now has been conquering some monsters and hides from others since death and near death are two places she does not care to be. To learn new skills needed to survive she often fights other heroes as well. She feels the constant frustration of being a child of godly decent but beside her wings that provide limited flight, she possesses no other god-like skills. Perhaps as time goes on she might discover new skills that might help her in her never ending series of quests but for now her only semi-developed skill is Navel Clamp.
To learn more about this heroine and kindly rate her chronicles with 5 stars (she needs all of the kindness and friends she can get in this lonely world) - please click here: [| The Heroine LisaAlexandra]
The Heroine's Quest for the Perfect Guild
The Heroine LisaAlexandra does not exactly know what she wants out of a guild nor truly understands the benefits. She just knows she must be a part of one of the Guilds since it is part of a hero's job. At first, she closed her eyes and picked a guild on a list and began her quest to join it. But a nice hero sold her on the idea of joining the Lovers of the Doughboy guild and that sounded quite exciting to LisaAlexandra so she made her plan to join that guild instead.
Meanwhile, LisaAlexandra's mother and goddess is protective of her and wants what is best for her so she has steered her toward the number one ranking guild in the hopes that her daughter will receive the utmost support and benefits to keep her healthy and safe. And so it was, the Heroine LisaAlexandra joined the #1 ranking guild, Knights who say Ni. The benefits were wonderful including better healthcare when in town, sometimes better deals with merchants and free hair cuts!
However, recently the Heroine has had her eye on the Kitty Cat Council guild and has started a quest to join it. Her goddess is very frustrated and unhappy with her and has shouted "Stop Quest!" and "Cancel Quest!" and "That quest is lame - stop it!" but being the stubborn adolescent that she is, the heroine LisaAlexandra has seemingly made up her mind and is ignoring her goddess. Of all creatures ever made, no other creature seems to be as good and loving as a kitty so how could this guild be the wrong guild to join?
The goddess looks on in despair not knowing why her daughter would run away from a guild that could offer her the most protection. If the heroine does not listen soon, she may have to finally resort to using punishments. This will be one of the most difficult things the goddess will have ever done since she has a pure good heart and punishing does not seem to be something you would do to someone you love. So she tried once more by saying, "Please!!!! Cancel Quest"
From the Heroine's Diary: 10:15 Suddenly realized that to become the 363rd member of the guild “Kitty Cat Council” doesn't sound heroic enough for my Chronicles. Thank you, Almighty, that could have been a real stain on my reputation!
The goddess breathed a sigh of relief and sent an encouragement to her daughter as a reward.
Guild Name Crest
Oct 7, 2011 - Weeks later, the heroine made an educated decision to join the Guild Name Guild (because they offer points!!) which is also a high ranking guild. The goddess rolled her eyes and decided to not continue this battle. At least that guild has good people in it to watch over her heroine.
Speaking of Points...
The heroine is very excited because her chronicle received high ratings and for a very short while (end of September of 2011) she held the #1 spot in the Storytelling pantheon. This is something she will tell her grandchildren one day.
The Heroine's Accomplishments According to the God of iPad
This list of accomplishments was last updated on Oct 12, 2011:
- Dressed to Kill
- Rabbit Ears
- Addicted (who isn't?)
- Treasure Trencher
- Greenhorn Bully
- Holy Paladin
Yet to be obtained:
- Grey Eminence (geez :/ I just switched guilds)
- Pet Expert (Ok Toto... don't die on me!)
- Autopilot (Yeah right. This one is impossible.)
- Dark Knight (My poor baby, how could I ever zap you?)
- Settled (Hmm... 6% in a month... guess it will be sometime next year!)
The Heroine's Personality
Thanks to her goddess, the heroine has a pure good and often (pure good!) personality.
Oct 4, 2011 - the heroine ranked #2 on the pantheon of Creation w/a pure good! personality.
Oct 12, 2011 - the heroine ranked #1 on the pantheon of Creation w/a pure good! personality.
The heroine really enjoys a good beer or three or ten and once in awhile it is up to her to keep peace on this planet by smoking a peace pipe with friends but her mother has drilled into her head (brainwashed perhaps) the importance of staying away from other drugs. And since activating auras are as personality altering as drugs and they cost her a lot of godpower and they do not offer her any substantial benefits - the heroine now has decided that auras should also be off limits so she tries not to activate any... whenever possible.
The Heroine's Pet
For as long as she can remember, LisaAlexandra has wanted each of the following pets:
- Double Dragon
- Trojan Horse
- Kitty Cat (Note in heroine's diary next to this list item: "Might not make the best fighter...")
"I'm sorry my darling heroine," said her goddess "but a Kitty Cat is not an option as a pet for you." The heroine sulked.
Update! As of Oct 11, 2011, the heroine has a Firefox! 09:10 AM I looked into the kind eyes of the vanquished monster and suddenly decided — Firefox, you'll be my pet! And I'll call you Toto. Bandaged his wounds, gave him a treat and fastened the leash. What a wonderful day.
And then this happened... 12:49 Toto knocked over some candles in the temple. What a clumsy oaf! We hid behind a curtain and watched as a priest doused the flames with some holy water from a basin.
But he's also often helpful... 02:34 It seems that the Gold Farmer has never fought a beast as amazing as my firefox. Come on Toto! Show it what you're made of!
First personality: "Droller" > To some can seem like a buffoon while to others seems amusingly odd and hyper-energetic which overwhelms most monsters. This over-achiever insists on being center stage and often grabs encouragements before their master can benefit from them. (note: this personality did not yet exist on the wiki, so I had to make it up.)
Oct 17, 2011 - Good news!! 01:23 Paid 228 gold coins to the veterinarian for a routine pet checkup. The vet said that Toto will live a long and healthy life. Now I just have to make sure he doesn't get run over by a monster!
12:43 Toto suddenly got a very surprised look on his face and mumbled something that sounded like: 'Why are you not looking for your father?'. Hmm, I thought he was of the non-talking kind.
The Heroine's Search for Her Father
The Heroine is rolling a small, iridescent orb between her fingers and staring out into the distance, thinking about what the fallen knight had told her.
Story coming soon...
The Heroine and Her Experience
The Heroine is dragging her aching feet and wishing she had more strength and experience. She remembered her goddess promising her that once she had more experience that all of her hero chores would be easier due to a larger health bar, the ability to carry a larger inventory and even the promise of being able to obtain pets that could carry her back to town when she is tired. "My goddess, how can I gain more experience... and faster?" she asked.
"My heroine," She replied, "Here are some things you can do to obtain more experience:
- Complete quests
- Fight monsters
- Fight in arena duels
- As of Oct 4, 2011 - her wins/losses record is 17 / 4
- As of Oct 14, 2011 - her wins/losses record is 27 / 4
- If you ever receive one of the Activatable Artifacts like a Mystery Box, A Box with a ? on it or Dues Ex Machina, use it. You might get lucky and receive a free level up.
- Complete a temple for me out of Gold Bricks and I will give you the ability to gain experience faster.
- Diary Entry - 10:50 Suddenly felt an urge to open the Continuum Transfunctioner. There was nothing inside, but I managed to get 1475 experience points in the process.
The heroine is easily distracted by shiny things and her A.D.D. has kicked in and now thinking about Gold Bricks...
Gold Bricks and A Temple for the Goddess
The heroine has found new excitement in the idea of building a temple for her Goddess. So she often looks in many places for gold bricks including:
- Found one in a Mystery Box!
- An Alchemical Transmuter turned another bold item into a gold brick!
- Winning in the arena
- When she has more than 3,000 coins she can melt them into a brick (her goddess often has to remind her that she has enough by providing some encouragement)
- How to acquire more coins:
- Defeating monsters
- Winning in the arena
- By opening a Mystery Box, A Box with a ? on it or Dues Ex Machina
- How to acquire more coins:
Oct 4, 2011 - 3.6% Only 964 Bricks to go! Current Market Value of 1 golden brick = 3161 gold coins -2.4%
Experience a plot-twist - Hmm... Like instead of the idea that I need my goddess, my goddess really needs me otherwise she no longer continues to be a goddess?
Learn to fly superhero style, fist-first - This one should be easy since I have wings! But how does everyone else do it?
"This map is not right!", said the heroine.
"You mean the map is not CORRECT", replied her goddess.
"Hmph, whatever", continued the heroine, "This Godwiki map says that Los Adminos is at milestone 130. And we went past 130, stopped at 132, turned around and it was still not at 130. But I see it now at 128. Whoever made this map is not a very good cartographer."
"Show some patience my heroine. Perhaps you can make your own map while on your adventures."
And so the heroine has decided to list the true mile markers of each city here when she finds them on her journeys.
(Map says: 30-beerburgh, 50-trollbridge, 70-los demonos, 100-tradeburg, 130-los adminos)
- 29? - Beerburgh
- Between 47 & 48 - Trollbridge
- Somewhere underground near 67 - Los Demonos
- 98 - Tradeburg
- 128 - Los Adminos
Heroine's navigation tip: All of these towns were found by going 2 miles past (higher number) the city's mapped location and then given the voice command of "return to town" and the heroine found each of the cities approximately 2 miles past (lower number) their official wiki-mapped location. The confusion is that the EXIT for each town is as it is located on the map but you cannot enter at the exit. :)
The Heroine's Favorite Things
Favorite Place to Be - Hanging Out in Guild Name
Favorite Personality - Pure Good!
Favorite Color - Sky Blue
Favorite Weapon - Broomstick (also a lazy way to fly without using her wings)
Favorite Skill - Battle Chess
Favorite Artifact - Dues Ex Machina
Favorite Economically Focused Friendly Robot - Epoch
Favorite Hat - Karen Hickey's Sombrero
Favorite Long Eye Lashed Frequent Acronym User - Your Ex Girlfriend/Strapping Lad
Favorite Inspirational Idea Generator - Grand Kourin/Morichika Rinnosuke
Favorite Ship Captain - Queue
Favorite Pet - Toto the Firefox (Also her ONLY pet)
Favorite Godville Dog - Sun God Apollo
Favorite Dumbledore's Beard - Nonnal/Sir Nonnally
Favorite Candy Lover and Kitty Handler - MTKnife/Theora
Favorite Drink - SRLazria/Elricka's Liquid Gold Beer
Favorite Witty Line Maker - Aurlord/Leweth
Favorite Windy Counter - Zephurious/Zephyrix
Favorite Doughboy Lover - Atdoughboy/Atdoughboy
Favorite Mini Pixels - Dumhed/Dumbut's chest hair
Favorite Godville Quoter - She Who Meditates/She Image
Favorite Egomaniac - Gorgeous George/Alextheaverage
Favorite Pantheon - Storytelling
Favorite Thing to Do - Throw 3,300 coins down a well to wish for more coins