Difference between revisions of "Knights who say Ni"

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*{{God|Katie The Almighty}}
*{{God|Katie The Almighty}}
*{{God|Mizu Seirei}}

Revision as of 02:19, 3 January 2012

Knights who say Ni
Motto: Beware the Ni-Sayers!
Alignment: Brightest
Gold Fund: ↑(5,847) to 144,715 c.u.
Membership Count: ↓(9) to 622
Town with Greatest Influence: San Satanos (13%)
Pantheon of unity Rank: 3
Forum Headquarters: Knights who say Ni
Guild Page: Knights who say Ni 
Data current as of 20th December 2011

We are Knights who say Ni. Ours is the path of honor and truth, a path of light, and seldom darkness. We came from the far away land of Monty, and traversed the terrible desert of Python to arrive in the world of Godville. Our mission is to proclaim the sacred words "Ni, Peng and Neee-wom", to collect shrubberies, and to learn to wield the mighty herring.


As one of the largest and most wealthy guilds in Godville, our members are treated with nothing but the best. Our guild hall is the most impressive building in the realm, and is equipped with a state of the art training center, although this is sometimes called the maze of death, the palace of pain, and that-place-where-we-keep-hearing-screams-from. The personalized hospital and the many lounges and areas of relaxation are the envy of many a hero. 

Yet of all these things our most notable is the magical table of the Knights who formerly owned a Square Table. This artifact has the rare power to create any food or beverage at will, simply by sitting down and wishing for your meal. Many heroes have been known to join simply for the never ending flow of beer that is available from this wondrous table. All other guilds beware, as any attempt to 'liberate' our table will result in the awesome power of "Ekke Ekke Ekke Ekke Ptang Zoo Boing Zow Zing!" No hero has ever been known to receive these words of power and live to tell the tale. 

If you wish to join the ranks of Ni-Sayers you must bring a shrubbery of suitable size to our guild master, GodZarquon . Be warned, failing to bring a large enough shrubbery will result in a slap of the herring and an order to repeat the quest. However you should also be aware that succeeding to join our guild will also earn you similar treatment in the form of the herring slap of entry. 

How to Join

To convince your hero to join the ranks of the Ni-Sayers you must send this command to your hero.

Join "Knights who say Ni" guild

For largest chance of success, send the command while your hero is "'outside of town"' and is idling. (i.e. not fighting a monster) If the above does not succeed after several tries, try replacing the word "join" with the word "enroll". 


Our glorious guild has recently made peace with the evil but powerful guild that is Harvest Moon. After a long bloody war we have learnt to respect each-other for who we are and we have stopped trying to convert them to the bright side.

We are also currently involved in conversations with the breadsticks guild. Despite having a banana obsession, they seem to be a pleasant bunch, and very respectful. A word of note: They seem to have developed the strange idea that we must use the word Ni in every post, and are even awarding themselves cookies when we fail to do so.

We had a quiet war with Wiki Leagues, as we felt they were a foolish guild and would surely be assassinated by government agents if we didn't discourage their ways. We shouted Ni at them until they slowly crumbled to dust.

We allied with Warped Quantum as was the wish of their great leader Spode who technically owns this page and every other page on the wiki (sort of) 

Arena Etiquette

As Knights of Ni, it is our duty to prove ourselves throughout the arena. To demonstrate, the power that each one of us holds. To show, to the rest of the guilds! What we are truly made of! For we are not your everyday opponent, no we are much worse. We are Knights. 

Every knight is expected to follow a set of rules when finding themselves in either the arena, or in a skirmish. 

1. Use of VCs The use of VCs (Voice commands) should contain either Ni, or a use of the word Knight. Ex. "Heal your wounds my Knight of Ni" "Heal your wounds champion! NI!" This is to distinguish ourselves from other guilds. 

2. Use of punishments Contrary to popular belief, we are not a guild who makes strict rules concerning the use of punishments, although being good aligned is encouraged, punishment is a useful tool in the arena and is expected to be used during a sticky situation. 

3. Language No foul language/Putting down your opponent through VCs. Anger should never be expressed towards an opponent during a battle. If you have a score to settle with someone you should either settle it through a PM or challenging the opposed to a duel.

4. Matching a member of the guild. Unfortunately opposition between two members of the same guild may happen. If it does, you may do one of two things: 1. Completely forfeit the match leaving it up to the heroes or 2. Fight like you would anyone else. If you are choosing the second you are expected to send a "good job" either through PM or on the forum.

5. Fighting a paying player without paying yourself. Perhaps what makes the most people give up on the arena is not paying for charges but going up against a paying player. Knights should never, never give up. Never. Use the three charges you can accumulate to bash the opponent into submission. However, it is highly highly unlikely you will win against a paying player with only three charges. If you are frustrated you may PM GodMortalin  and he will provide you with a guide for the arena.

And possibly the most important.

6. Have fun. If the arena wasn't meant to be fun, no one would use it! 

Guild Officers

GodMortalin  Titles: Master Ni Sayer/Guild Assasin/ The Black Knight

Mortalin quickly proved his dedication to the art of Ni-Saying, and is always willing to help with any dangerous mission. It is worthy of notice that Mortalin is one of the few evil-aligned members of the guild, although the trend seems to be catching on among the gladiators. Mortalin has been trained as an assasin by Sensei blood and even has his own evil arena. (Noone really knows what this arena looks like but, since the regular arena is pretty fearsome it is likely that his arena is utterly terrifying.) His assasin skills are similar to Zarquon's abilities and they are often involved in similar missions. After the stepping down of Zarquon, Mortalin was voted in the new leader. He is always open to suggestions and problems if you wish to tell him.

GodColdwilson  Titles: Guild founder/ Patron of Ni

As the founder of our guild, Coldwilson was a fine leader and deeply devoted until a great tragedy occurred. Coldwilson abandoned his hero who, shunned and alone, left this guild and joined the green bottles cult. He did not want to reclaim his title and has let Zarquon continue his job. Even though Coldwilson is no longer active, he has earned himself an eternal officership for founding the guild.

GodZarquon  Titles: Residant Ninja / Protecter of Shrubburies/Second In Command

Zarquon was one of the earliest members, and was appointed as the new leader after Coldwilson's departure. Zarquon ruled for many moons before passing on the title of leader to his second in command, Mortalin. He now holds the second in command spot and leaves behind some of the greatest times the knights have ever enjoyed.

Distinguished Members

All distinguished and long-standing members will be recognized here.

GodVirus Ex  AKA That Weird German Guy Virus is a rather unpredictable member. He seems to always find something to do even at the most dull of moments. That very attribute seems to have made him a favorite with the knights. Insistent on being called That Weird German Guy, virus is just that.


Suzan tries hard to ensure that every new member is up to date on their entry tasks. Making Sure the proper shrubbery is checked and recorded. Despite one incident with strange, metal birds, she has most definently made a name for herself.


Jorge52 or Jorge is the guild's barkeeper. This is a very important job, indeed some members consider this to be the most important job of all. Beware his fuschia coloured drink with a special ingredient or at least make certain you are prepared for it.


Phi, is the guild scientist. Sometimes refered to as "Mad" she tends the guild laboratory. And while no one other than her has ever been to the lab, it is assumed she uses her many skills for all that is good and shrubby. It is possibly a good thing that the lab is not public since many dangerous experiments go on.


One of the strangest members of the guild, Necro has shown that he can be just as random or goofy as any fool. So it is fitting he be the guild jester. His jester staff is capable of making anyone collapse and burst into laughter. Even at the stalest of jokes. To which he has no shortage of.

GodMizu Seirei 

Mizu is the guild's librarian, though many do not even know what a library is. Her vast knowledge on past, present, and future has saved many a knight in their unguided travels. Watch out, because not all of her books are friendly.

Temple Owners

Behold! The temple owners of our great guild! No doubt that they have worked hard to get to where they stand today. May we all some day be so lucky, and may this list grow beyond the stars.

GodWesha  Date Completed: 06/26/11

GodTim The Enchanter  Date Completed: 10/13/11

GodAyem The Greatest  Date Completed: 11/27/11

GodDivin-O-Saurus Rex  Date Completed: 11/30/11

Knights of Ni

All active members of the guild will be noted here. If you feel that your name should be here, please contact GodMortalin .

Goodbye to:

GodThe God that Passed  (the original second in command to Zarquon)

Passed was a loyal Knight for many months, and became Second in Command when Coldwilson left the guild. He was very active on the forums especially when Zarquon and he had to restore the guild and was responsible for assigning chores and difficult quests to worthy Knights. His many tasks and responsibilities caused him to pass on the mantle of leadership to Sensei for a while, until he may find the time to take them up again. We still hope that one day he may return to our halls.

GodSensei Blood  (loyal second in command to Zarquon)

Sensei joined the guild at a young age, yet quickly gained approval as he grew in experience. An immensely humble fellow, he built our training center as a place to whip the other members into shape. He was in charge of molding the talents of each recruit into a solid fighting form, and usually withheld their beer privileges until the training was completed. He was an exceptional guild member, everything a knight should be, and his death is a great loss to us all.

Fare ye well...