Beer belly

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Type: Combat skill

This skill is more prevalent in male heroes than females.[1] This skill is dependent on your hero's drinking frequency when visiting towns. Therefore, this is known as the most preferred skill for which to need training; most heroes are continuously pursuing higher achievement in this skill whether they know it or not.[2]

Offensive and Defensive Uses

The beer belly skill allows the hero to develop a stomach that looks not unlike he is hiding a watermelon under the shirt. The inflated abdomen offers both attack and defense potential. As an offensive combat skill, the beer belly can be used for "belly bucking"[3] This causes blunt-force trauma as well as the possibility of knocking over the enemy. A high level of beer belly skill can also give the user the power to shake the ground as he walks, causing opponents to loose their footing and fall down.

Used as a defensive skill, the beer belly affords the user a layer of protection on the abdomen. Strikes directed at the midsection of a hero using this skill will have a chance of deflecting the blow entirely. Even attacks that are not deflected by the beer belly will do 25% less damage due to the shock-absorbing power of the engorged gut.

Effects

Beer Belly in action (inaction?)

Level 1-5

The hero will have a "pooch" in their belly, a tiny bulge, which is barely even noticeable when they are wearing a bikini. This affords minimal offensive and defensive usefulness, but also doesn't impair the hero's chances with the shop owner's attractive offspring.

Level 6-10

The hero will be able to "pinch an inch" of fat around their waist, but it does not really hurt the monster in any way. The greater girth can be intimidating to smaller monsters, and will definitely have everyone around the water cooler gossiping about how the skill user has "really let himself go."[4]

This hero is modeling skill level 16

Level 11-20

The hero can "grab a slab" of fat, intimidating the monster slightly. Weaker attacks can be deflected by the increasing rubberiness of the abdomen at these levels. Cannonballing into a swimming pool will cause a loss of 60% of the pool's water.

Level 21+

The hero has a round, protruding belly thanks to their alcohol consumption. They can use it to push, shove, hit, slap, or move the monster out of the way and sometimes taking their breath away. Missile attacks to the midriff will bounce off harmlessly. The ground trembles when the hero stomps his feet.

References

  1. ↑ Possibly sexist, but also true.
  2. ↑ "They're all in here, all hours of the day and night, training for their so-called "beer belly skill", like that's not something they just made up!" -- anonymous Godville tavern worker
  3. ↑ https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Belly%20bucking This is a thing.
  4. ↑ at least that's what we heard from Janice in Accounting...
JanuWiki 2019
Monsters
Lagers Ale-Chemist πŸ» Barbeerian πŸ» Beer Cub πŸ» Beer Golem πŸ» Beer Mugger πŸ» Beerburglar πŸ» Beerkat πŸ» Beerserker πŸ» Beerwolf πŸ» Boartender πŸ» Brewpid the Reindeer πŸ» Diet Sprite πŸ» Drinkerella πŸ» Extra Dry Djinn πŸ» Methylated Spiritualist πŸ» Red Bull πŸ» Tea Rex πŸ» Tequila Mockingbird
Tigers Basement Cat πŸ± Bureau-Cat πŸ± Fat Cat πŸ± Meowntain Cat πŸ± Neferkitty πŸ± Photocopycat πŸ± Punk Panther πŸ± Weakest Lynx
Bears Bear Minimum πŸ» Drop Bear
Oh My! Adminotaur πŸ‹οΈ Boozerker πŸ‹οΈ Godbuster πŸ‹οΈ Thug-of-war πŸ‹οΈ Wraptor
Other Articles
Artifacts Bar tab πŸ» Beer-battered beer πŸ» Beer-scented soap πŸ» Bottle of beer from a wall πŸ» Bottle of domesticated beer πŸ» Bottle of holy ale πŸ» Can of ambrosia πŸ» Exclamation pint πŸ» β€œFree beer” ticket πŸ» Instant beer tablet πŸ» Pint of no return πŸ» Strange brew πŸ» Vanishing pint
Equipment Ancient cork πŸ» Awkward paws πŸ» Bear arms πŸ» Beer goggles
Quests Brew a storm in a teacup πŸ» Sit in a tavern and write fake diary entries
Skills Beer belly πŸ» Lion belch
Taverns All Inn πŸ» The Battle Toad πŸ» Caravanserai πŸ» Progress Bar πŸ» The Rumor Mill πŸ» The Sword & Sandal πŸ» The Whinery