Unbearable Grizzly

Pets of Godville

Unbearable Grizzly
Ursus arctos intolerabilis
Strong Monster
Class	Mammal
Habitat	Anywhere there are people who will listen to its jokes
Description	Grizzly bear full of unbearable puns
Pet
Tame at levels	100–114 (129 with ark)
Features	Fighting, looting, sailing
v · t

The Unbearable Grizzly (Ursus arctos intolerabilis) is a tamable monster of the bear family.

History

Tavern legends say the Unbearable Grizzly evolved from a Rootbear that gained the gift of speech. Blessed with the potential to integrate itself into society, it regrettably chose a career as a comedian. Its stand-up act consisted solely of bear puns, and it is said that the Unbearable Grizzly is responsible for Godville's plethora of bear puns.

Unfortunately, that is the extent of the Unbearable Grizzly's contribution to society. Its comedy was so bad that it was chased out of every town it performed in. Now it roams the land, searching for any hero who will listen to its stand-up routine and attacking any who refuses to laugh.

Appearance

The Unbearable Grizzly shares many characteristics of a Rootbear, including their large size, weight, claws, and teeth. They also share a muscular hump on their shoulders and the ability to stand and walk on their hind legs.

The primary difference between the two species is the presence of a bowler hat on the Unbearable Grizzly's head, between its ears. It has also been reported that it has a larger head, most likely due to its ability to speak, or perhaps because of its inflated ego.

There is a theory that its intelligence and gift of speech comes from its bowler hat, and that if it is removed, it turns back into a Rootbear. This is supported by the bear's protectiveness of it. However, this theory remains unproven due to there being no scientists willing to approach the insufferable bear. Also because it looks quite good with it.

Taming

Any hero wishing to tame the Unbearable Grizzly must first question their sanity. Only insane heroes would desire the company of such a pet. Once a hero has found that they have a sufficient lack of sanity, they will find that it is easy to tame an Unbearable Grizzly.

The Unbearable Grizzly is in constant search of anyone who will tolerate its awful jokes. Therefore, all a hero has to do is listen and laugh and they will gain a friend for life, or until they can't stand it anymore. Heroes with this pet are advised to keep plenty of earplugs on them and practice their fake laughs.

Attributes

Strengths

• Sharp claws and teeth
• Fast for its size
• Never-ending supply of horrible puns
• Intelligent — it's a talking bear

Weaknesses

• Tomatoes and other thrown produce
• Sensitive to criticism
• Extremely protective of its hat