Think tankard

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Artifacts of Godville
Think tankard
Type 🧷Normal
Description A conceptual device in the shape of a stein.

The think tankard is a normal artifact carried by many monsters in Godville. While it nominally resembles a stein, it is a conceptual artifact used in the illustration of volumetric values as pertain to alcoholic drinks.


When a hero asks a bartender about the amount of beer it would take to fill an ocean, the bartender reaches for a think tankard. When a hero muses about how much small beer it takes to equal a good nut-brown ale, he observes a think tankard. When a wide-eyed street urchin whispers in reverent horror a query about how much beer a hero can drink, even a think tankard fails to encompass the necessary volume.

This artifact, though deceptively normal, has become a scientific mainstay in the pursuit of universal answers concerning alcoholic beverages. Even vintners appear to consider it a viable vessel for their product, at least as far as measurement goes. It is generally recorded to be a stein-shaped thought process, or a physical manifestation thereof born through especially wishful yearning.

Material Components

Think tankards are currently under investigation for exactly what composed them. Current theories suggest:

  • 20% thoughts.
  • 5% hopes.
  • 16% dreams and wishes.
  • 8% boredom.
  • 1% wonder.
  • 50% ???????????

Trading Advice

  • A hero will generally get the best price for a think tankard from a hero-trader shortly before lunch time or quitting time, when the potential buyer's desire for a good pint is strongest.
  • Keep this artifact guarded from all Trojan Horse pets, as it is generally reported to be a favorite snack.