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User:OhMG

4,847 bytes added, 14:36, 22 May 2011
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Since level 18
==Level 19==
===5/21/2011===
* 22:15: Sneezy growled at the trader. The trader swallowed nervously and gave us a generous discount.
* 20:41: I was going to buy a book on phobias, but I was afraid that it wouldn't help me.
* 08:11: Sneezy suddenly stood to attention and purred. Then he rushed into the bushes and pulled out an IQ degenerator. What a clever pet!
* 08:11: Felt a burning desire to disassemble the mystery box. Found a notarized document inside stating that I've died fewer times than I thought. Nice.
* 19:46: Sneezy snorts disdainfully and laughs at my futile attempts to determine the terminal airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow. Now he is making snickering noises. If you think it's so easy, why don't you do it yourself, you silly rocky raccoon?
* 19:36: Taught my pet to perform some simple tricks. It seems that Sneezy has already mastered the “Sleep” command.
* 17:12: Took time out from my busy schedule of death and destruction for a spot of knitting.
* 17:09: Baffled by the strange clicking noises coming from the heavens.
* 17:01: Walked into a bar... That's going to leave a bruise.
* 16:53: I'm so broke, I can't even afford to pay attention.
* 16:39: Silly rocky raccoon got under my feet, and I almost stepped right on him. Sneezy, don't get on my nerves!
* 16:41: Arrogantly shoved aside the guild newbies on my way to the doctor's office. Restored a decent part of my health bar.
** (just noticed I've been promoted from master of my Guild to "chief master")
* 16:35: Participated in a banana-throwing contest with the local monkeys. Now I'm “fruited up” beyond all recognition.
* 16:32: Spent a few hours staring into the abyss. Had the eerie sensation of being watched.
* 16:23: Pondered free will for a moment, then decided not to pursue it.
* 15:47: Sneezy came closer and started licking my wounds. Suddenly I felt better, even without all these doctors and their huge syringes.
* 15:41: Sneezy cuddled up to my bruise and calmingly purred. Suddenly I felt a little bit better.
* 15:37: Hopkinton Rhubarb III took the monster aside, giving me plenty of time to get away. Don't worry Vorpal Wabbit, I'll get you next time!
* 15:36: Felt itchy. Scratched.
* 15:32: Sneezy buried the "Watchmen" guild membership card that he found. Is that his way of showing contempt for that guild?
* 15:27: Participated in a banana-throwing contest with the local monkeys. Now I'm "fruited up" beyond all recognition.
* 14:39: Sneezy wagged his tail and looked fondly at my alchemical transmuter. I went ahead and gave it to him. Let the brute play.
* 14:39: With one clean blow, the Unicorndog was sent on its final journey. I searched its lifeless body and found 12 coins and an alchemical transmuter.
* 14:35: Crazy scientists have given me another quest: determine the terminal airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow.
* 14:04: Silly rocky raccoon got under my feet, and I almost stepped right on him. That would have ended badly.)
* 14:02: Hope that I won't have to journey there and back again again. But the reward was good: an extra dose of experience and a shiny golden brick!
** (Quest Complete)
* 14:02: I've returned to the spot where I began my journey at, only to find out that nothing had changed.
* 13:49: I just saw the violence inherent in the system.
* 13:44: I was just wondering... As a hero, am I supposed to have a secret identity or something? Oh, and maybe I should get a costume. I'll look great in tights!
* 13:36: I suppose this is a good place to journey there and back again. Let's go!
** (unfortunately, my quest is only 96% complete)
* 13:35: A wandering monk saw my pet and said something about training, carrots and sticks... Sneezy became anxious. I wonder why?
* 13:21: Waited for the quest to complete itself, but nothing happened. Darn it.
* 13:18: Sneezy knocked over some candles in the temple. What a clumsy oaf! We hid behind a curtain and watched as a priest put out the flames with some holy water from a basin. Don’t worry, my Lady, it was a public temple and they don’t pray to you anyway...
* 13:16: Sneezy tossed 11 gold coins into the donations cup. I wonder where he got that money? Oh well, it’s not important. To your glory, my Lady!
* 12:40: I was walking along a path when I noticed a long trail of wilted flowers behind me... I believe it's time I took a bath.
* 11:33: There were red-inked corrections in my diary when I woke up. Was that you my goddess, or did I become smarter in my sleep?
* 09:38: Sometimes I feel that life is an endless series of quests.
* 09:35: Lady, I have you and Sneezy, but why do I still feel like something's missing from my life?
* 09:31: Sneezy sat aside to watch my epic battle with the monster. You're so worthless, rocky raccoon.
* 09:30: Saw a big red dot on the ground. Next to it were the words, 'You are here'. Well, duh!
===5/20/2011===
* 21:39: It seems that Sneezy just tried to use the "liana-eyebrows" skill. Of course he failed. What a noob.
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