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User:High king of undies

3,386 bytes added, 09:24, 4 April 2016
Mad-man Mike's Chronicles
Almighty, are you part of all of this as well?
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* <span id="Approval">'''Time to make some money'''</span>
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One million gold, I've really saved up one million gold! Time to head back to the Daily Tankard to get my chronicles published all over Godville. Or at least that's what I thought.
 
Upon arriving at the Daily Tankard I was approached by the city guards. They forcefully dragged me into a dark alley and warned me not to spend any of the gold in my savings. Apparently that's against the rules of the Godville Administrators. Corruption! Godville's city guards are corrupted I tell you! I will rewrite my chronicles myself again and again if that's what it takes to show everyone the truth!
 
At least that was my plan until the guards offered to pay for all my drinks tonight. You know, Almighty, forgive and forget... right?
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* <span id="Approval">'''Dungeons'''</span>
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It's so dark in here, I can't see a thing!
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* <span id="Approval">'''Dungeons part 2'''</span>
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Who would have thought? It's hard to see underground with your eyes closed. It might not be a bad thing.
 
Every now and then my lord wants me to descend down into a dungeon with other heroes. Fallen heroes, traps, gremlins and terrifying bosses. No, dungeons are no joke.
 
And if you thought it couldn't get any worse you constantly hear the voice of false gods ordering me around. When I want to go south I get the words "go west" burned into my eyelids. At least that's easy to see with your eyes closed.
 
And the worst thing of all! When we finally get to the treasure which is enough to buy us all beer for a week we have to deposit it all in a box so our gold is immediately stored onto our bank account.
 
What are we saving for anyway? What could my lord possible want to get that's so expensive?! Does he intend to melt all that gold into bricks and order me to build 999 more temples?! Please, Almighty, don't do that to me.
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* <span id="Approval">'''Guildleader'''</span>
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What do they think they are doing? Are they all insane?! Well yh... I already knew that, but why? Why choose my god to lead the guild?
 
He's so unreasonable! Healing my wounds just so I can get attacked again by monster without beer breaks in between. Punishing me when I slack off. Making me build a golden temple. Seriously, what's wrong with normal bricks? And now he wants to save up 30 million gold and build an ark out of gopher wood logs. What's wrong with normal wood planks?
 
They want a god like mine to lead them? Soon I won't be the only unfortunate hero who has to endure all this. Every hero and heroine from Blue Feather will have to! And soon every hero in existence!
 
_a few moments later_
 
What? Every hero already has to do all of this! I wanted to warn everyone about what was coming but they already had to do all that from the start. Is this some kind of game to you, Almight?! Are we all just a bunch of NPC's in a text based game to you?
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