Escape Goat

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Monsters of Godville
Escape Goat
Profugius Caprigenus
A young Escape Goat, probably escaping from some angry villagers or disappointed soap patrons.
Class Ungulate (Goat)
Habitat The lam, the road, and occasionally the edge
Description A goatlike monster characterized by the seemingly involuntary ability to induce a powerful compulsion to blame all of your problems and woes on them.

The Escape Goat (Profugius Caprigenus) is one of the most pitiable and easy to hate monsters of Godville. Resembling a rather beat up, angry goat, they tend to have a pessimistic outlook and general loathing for the world.

Original Motivation of the Escape Goat

Most Escape Goats have an unpleasant early life. For some reason, when there is a problem, young monsters always blame the Escape Goats. Things get even worse from there. By the time they grow big enough to survive on their own they have experienced so much hardship that any shreds of happiness have been stripped away to reveal a monster bent on killing anything in their way and making the rest of the world as miserable as they are.

Almost all Escape Goats then set out on their own to make this dream a reality. Heroes, being so obsessed with saving lives and such, become big targets. The worst part about them is that they don't care if they die. An Escape Goat throws everything they have into a battle. They will never flee. The Escape Goat plays to either win or die.

The Ritual of the Escape Goat

For thousands of years, whole towns have gathered in yearly rituals, letting the Escape Goat wander through and suffer to be told that everything that has ever been wrong is the sole fault of the Escape Goat. The Escape Goat then carries the burden of guilt away from all the townspeople, never to be seen again, until the next year, when they do the ritual all over again.

Monsterologists, scientists and researchers alike have long been interested in the phenomena of the Scape Goat's ability to absorb blame. It is unknown whether the effect is biological, magical, alchemical, psychological or psychic in nature. Scape Goats are difficult to research, however, owing to the fact that no one can stand to be around them for very long.

Milk of the Escape Goat

Soap made from the milk of the Escape Goat is prized for its richness and the ability to make all one's problems disappear in the wash. The soap has euphoric properties and is very valuable for this reason and also because of its rarity: as mentioned above, it's difficult to be around an Escape Goat long enough to milk them.

Consumption of the milk or dairy of an Escape Goat is not recommended. If ingestion does occur, the subject may experience unbearable regret. Side effects include uncontrollable crying, fits of self-loathing, craving for spinach, lethargy and vomiting. The application of constant reassurance, hugs and teddy bears is advised, though the carrying-the-world-on-one's-shoulders attitude may be permanent.



  • Has seen worse
  • Impervious to insults


  • Easily banished
  • Cute only from afar
  • Self-sacrificial