Lana Reginald

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Lana Reginald
Champion of the God: EJ Rose
Personality: Nice but not necessarily good
Gender: Female
Level: 77
Motto: I AM the Great... I AM!
Guild: I AM
Guild Rank: Cardinal
Guild Position: Chronicler
Wins / Losses: 41 / 8
Temple Completion Date: March 22, 2016
Pet Type: Grounded hog
Pet Name: Elbaggoh
Pet Level: 18
Pet Healing Count: A lot
Favorite Town: Los Demonos
Largest Ever Gold: 57---
Most Hated Monster: Firefox
Personal Rival: No one

Lana Reginald, born "Lana", Chronicler and former Leader of guild I AM, Esteemed Founder and Red Rose of the "Order of Rosamund" is a valiant, righteous and charismatic heroine of Godville under the protection and guidance of goddess EJ Rose and accompanied by her most loyal steed, Buck, the Trojan Horse. She spends most of her time killing monsters and completing quests for glory, honor, gold and beer. Her goal in life is to find The One who is destined to be with her forever. That and to finish the ark her goddess asked her to build. In her spare time, she can be found in the guild headquarters, the Stinky Cave Tavern in Los Demonos or behind the Stinky Cave tavern, drunk, passed out and mumbling in her sleep.

Early Life

Birth and Childhood

Lana's origin and parenthood remains unknown even to this day. When Lana was a still a babe, someone left her in the bathroom of the King's Men Tavern in Deville. The tavern owner's daughter, Leanna, found her during the night and decided to raise her as her own and named her Lana after her own dear departed mother. At first, Jack, the tavern owner, was not happy with his daughters' decision. But after he saw that the baby kept unwanted heroes from harassing his daughter, he accepted Lana as family. They cared for her like she was one of their own.

Lana grew knowing full well that Jack and Leanna were not her blood relatives. Lana always wondered what her real parents were like. She would often imagine that they were great heroes who defeated many monsters and found endless treasures like the heroes who would often visit King's Men Tavern. This became her motivation to become a hero herself. When she turned 12, Jack and Leanna gave their consent for her to go to Herowin to learn how to become a hero.


Before arriving at Herowin, Lana had a simple education at home. She learned how to write, read, add and subtract. This skill is especially useful when taking orders and computing charges in the tavern. As for her physical prowess in battle, she knew enough to defend herself from drunk patrons in the tavern.

In Herowin, she applied in the Academy for Noble Heroes and Heroines, the most prestigious school of Heroism in all of Godville. Unfortunately, she didn't pass the exam. She had to enroll to the Institute of Heroism instead.

There she received her education in "Diary Writing: The First Step to Heroism", "Alcohol Consumption Endurance" and "Ignoring the Voice of God" among others. After one week of intense diary-writing, vomiting and ignoring, she graduated and got her diploma.

Goddess and Name

On her way back to Deville to see her family, Lana did not realize she had passed the landmark of Deville and was well on her way to Lostway instead. While traveling, she encountered a Bipolar Bear. Despite her fear and her inexperience, she fought the Bear valiantly and triumphed against it with the help of an exploding atomic kitten. Little did Lana knew that a goddess was observing and noted her bravery against the beast. The goddess introduced herself as Emjero Fortin and she bestowed her favor upon Lana, making her the goddess's heroine.

Together they traveled to Godville and there officially registered Lana as Lana Reginald with her Goddess Emjero Fortin.


Diary and Quests

Lana Reginald started her heroic adventures the same way that other heroes before her did, by buying a diary and accepting her first quest.

!Lana Reginald's Diary
00:01 Finally got my diary! Now I'm a real hero, Soul Supreme!
paint the town red

Since then Lana Reginald has completed 999 quests so far and she is on her 1000th quest at the time of this update.

Break the record for most records broken (epic)

She has also gone through numerous diaries, throwing them away after filling them with her adventures. She and her goddess did not keep count.

Beers and Monsters

Like all heroes before and after her, Lana loves beer. In her childhood she promised herself she will never become a beer-loving hero because she saw how heroes get when they're drunk. It all changed after she took the Alcohol Consumption Endurance course in the Institute of Heroism. Lana found out, the hard way, that beer is love, beer is life. Emjero Fortim disapproves but who cares?

!Lana Reginald's Diary
14:19 I'm just acting drunk, Great One. Of course I'm a method actor...

The first Monster Lana Reginald fought as a hero was a Beer Hunter. She encountered it while traveling from Godville as it tried to steal her beers. Like all beer-addicted heroes, she slayed the monster before it could say "beer".

!Lana Reginald's Diary
19:12 The Beer Hunter tried to steal my beer so I stole his life instead...

Skills and Equipment

Lana was traveling while drinking when she stumbled upon a double dragon. Drunk and dizzy, she started getting confused by the quadruple heads that she was seeing. She started shouting words and wildly swinging her sword at the by then 12 dragons heads and increasing with every move. Because of her frequent and sudden movements, her bowel couldn't take it and pushed up all the booze that she was drinking only a few minutes before. The dragon was so disgusted with Lana that it flew far far away from her, never to be heard from again. Lana had just learned the seasickness skill.

Since then she has learned a number of helpful skills like sober view, unbearable boredom and rickrolling. Lana continues to better herself by mastering her acquired skills and trading some.

The very first equipment that Lana owned was an old exacto knife. It was given to her by the patron heroes of the King's Men tavern as a graduation gift. At first, Lana thought this was enough as a hero, but after encountering the 12 headed dragon (or so she thought), she decided she needed better equipment and since then has improved her weapon and armor every chance she gets. She is a devout follower of the most fashionable equipment trends of Godville.

A complete list of her current skills and equipment can be found in her profile page.

Arena and Dungeon


Lana was once a newbie and rookie who didn't know what heroes were supposed to do to please their gods. One day, Lana was walking the streets of Godville when she noticed all people going to this magnificent building in the middle of town. Curiosity got the better of her and she went along with them. When she saw a bunch of heroes waiting in line, she joined the queue, thinking it was for free popcorn or beer or something. When it was her turn, she found out to to get the free popcorn and beer, she must defeat another hero in a fierce battle... to the death! *Roll drums for dramatic effect*

PantyStocking is on her knees. Lana Reginald sing praises to her goddess! The winner receives a golden brick and 1386 gold coins.

Since then, Lana has participated in the Godville Arena for free beer and popcorn. Currently her record stands at 41 wins and 7 losses.


After completing EJ Rose's temple, Lana learned a new type of adventure in which she can give glory to her goddess. By chance, she saw a group of heroes furiously digging the earth. At the command of EJ Rose, she dig with the heroes until they found a dungeon. Scared to be left behind outside, Lana Reginald joined the heroes as they explored the dungeon. Unfortunately, because of her inexperience and that of her companions, they were defeated and left the dungeon with nothing to show for it.

The defeated team of heroes was carried to the surface by dungeon janitors. They were charged a hefty fee of gold and trophies.

Since that first one, Lana Reginald has searched through many dungeons, most of the time finding the treasure and sometimes giving up, always with the guidance of her goddess, EJ Rose. Here is an entry from her last dungeon campaign:

The adventurers have walked through the whole dungeon and found the treasure trove! The heroes plunder the treasure trove and divide the loot. Lana Reginald gets 9976 gold coins, a log for the ark, an Encyclopedia Heroica, an Encyclopedia Heroica, a mystery box and a fallen star.


Lana Reginald's first epic endeavor is to build her goddess a temple made of 1000 golden bricks. This is in no way, unique for our hero as all heroes build golden temples for their gods all the time. The difficulty comes when acquiring the coveted golden bricks to build the temple with. After 10 months of questing and monster slaying, Lana was able to complete her goddess' temple on 2143 g.e. and was promptly blessed as The Rose Temple by EJ Rose herself.

!Lana Reginald's Diary
14:03 Carefully placed the last brick, swept all the rooms, opened all doors, and cut the ribbon in a stately manner with my sword. I can’t believe it’s finally happened! After all these months of work, the temple in your name is finished, my Lady! I feel crazy with happiness.


Lana's second epic endeavor is building her goddess an ark made of gopher wood. For what purpose, she didn't know. Lana has found that collecting wood is vastly different and more difficult than collecting golden bricks as quests, more often than not, pay her in golden bricks instead of gopher logs since cutting down gopher trees became illegal due to the high demand for their logs. Yet having a temple in her goddess' name, Lana has often found gopher logs in the temple left by pilgrims and followers of EJ Rose.

!Lana Reginald's Diary
20:52 A random pilgrim left me a log of wood in your temple. I love it when that happens, my Lady!

On 2722 g.e., Lana collected her 1000th gopher log and completed her goddess' ark. The ark was christened as Black Rose. Lana herself gave the name when she drew it from a raffle ticket, thinking it was a sign from EJ Rose.

!Lana Reginald's Diary
09:14 A log! A thousandth log! I’m even ready for a flood now. Not that I’m asking for it, Exalted One.

I AM Guild

When Lana was still a new heroine trying to learn everything she can about being a heroine, an old sage came up to her and said, "What guild do you belong to, oh brave heroine? For I see in your future, the wrong guild will bring about you and your goddess' destruction! Beware!". Having no idea what guilds are, Lana Reginald ignored the sage and decided to be a guildless hero.


One day, Lana Reginald walked into the Stinky Cave Tavern in Los Demonos. There was a party going on. Unbeknownst to Lana, it was election week and the candidates were throwing a party for the guild members. Lana decided to join them, befriending them because she thought she could get free beer this way. When the time came to pay up, she said, "oh, I'm with them. I'm new.". The barkeep registered her name and told her to sign then she can leave. Lana signed the book without even asking what it's for and unwittingly became a member of the I AM guild.