Ctrl-Alt-Delinquent

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Monsters of Godville
Ctrl-Alt-Delinquent
anonymoose.jpg
Class Mammal/Machine hybrid
Habitat Wherever there is Internet
Description Masked cyber criminal

The Ctrl-Alt-Delinquent is a common monster.

Description

Consisting mostly of teenagers wishing to impress their parents about how "edgy" they are and with a free access to Internet, this monster lurks in any place where he can go online. Groups of Ctrl-Alt-Delinquents are a rare sight in the wild, this monster using the power of the Internet to converse with it's pack, find a potential mate or just to order junk food. Any attemps to communicate with such creatures failed, as the Ctrl-Alt-Delinquent only communicates in a mysterious tongue known only as "l33tsp34k". Rumor has it that to understand such a language, one must become one of the Ctrl-Alt-Delinquents.

Of course, nobody dares to test this theory out of fear and plain desire of not looking like a weirdo. Covered head-to-toe in dark clothing, including a face-covering mask and carrying a keyboard as a weapon, this monster lurks anywhere, but express a notable preference for dark or shady places; studies show the Ctrl-Alt-Delinquent winces and hisses every time it is exposed to sunlight, showing a strong dislike for it. Being one of the few monsters that never show signs of fatigue or the need to sleep, this indicates a preference for nocturnal activity.

Motivated by greed, boredom or plain evil (or "l0lz0rz" in his tongue), the Ctrl-Alt-Delinquent follows a simple but very confusing two-step attack pattern when facing a prey. It will first attempt to confuse his target by using his secret tongue's battle cries and showing them revered icons among his kin; those will appear as meaningless and random images with text to a non-l33tsp34k speaker. Once the target is dazzled, the Ctrl-Alt-Delinquent will activate the second phase of the pattern: clubbing the target using it's keyboard. Once his prey regains consciousness, the monster will repeat the first step until the target or the monster dies.It is said that the strongest Ctrl-Alt-Delinquents can fire energy rays from their keyboard.

Upon death, the Ctrl-Alt-Delinquent will vanish into a cloud of bright green zeroes and ones, leaving only a bloody keyboard and a pile of empty clothing where they stood. Unless disposed of, a teenager with Internet access will inevitably find the remains of the monster, think "This will look good on me" and put them on, creating a new Ctrl-Alt-Delinquent. This makes this species of monsters virtually immortal.


Attributes

Strengths

  • Virtually immortal
  • Very confusing in combat
  • Never sleeps

Weaknesses

  • Laughing at his mask causes him to throw a tantrum
  • Doesn't like sunlight
  • Cutting off the Internet in the area will make him powerless