Cold shoulder

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Artifacts of Godville
Cold shoulder
Artifact-warehouse.jpg
Is it shivering, or just shuddering at the thought of having to interact with you?
Type 🧷Normal
Description A chilly chunk of meat containing a ball-and-socket joint.


For some reason, it seems like this artifact is ignoring you. Given that this cold shoulder is truly just a refrigerated hunk of meat containing a ball-and-socket joint, its ability to communicate disdain is preternatural.

About

Cold shoulders come in all types, from lizard to lamb to you-don't-want-to-know, and generally have nothing in common except for a radiant aura that communicates, "Don't touch me. You aren't worth my time or effort."

The most bizarre of Godville's fashion trends in recent years has surrounded the cold shoulder. Often, designers of catwalk haute couture are incorporating cold shoulders into their business shirts for women, and into evening gowns for both sexes. This trend is considered cutting-edge fashion, but is roundly mocked as cold-cut-edge fashion.

In 2997 g.e., a rumor went around that the physical therapy wing of The Whinery forced its masseuses and masseurs to practice deep-tissue massage on cold shoulders. Widespread opinion held that this was cruelty to massotherapists, and a society was formed to prevent future suffering. The society disbanded when the massotherapists evidenced reluctance to provide members with complimentary treatment.

Sales Tip

A cold shoulder can be cooked or can be raw. This is an important distinction to note, because could shoulders cannot be actively cooked. If a heroine seeks to sell a cooked cold shoulder, the best prices come from merchants who resell to restaurants and delicatessens. If a heroine instead seeks to sell a raw cold shoulder, the best option is to find a trader connected to the food advertisement industry, which will value the shoulder for its ability to wear food makeup and never spoil.