Cobweb gulp

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Skills of Godville
Cobweb gulp
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Type ⚔️Combat
Description Not suited for arachnophobic.

The Cobweb Gulp is a Combat Skill usually practiced when confronting enemy Heroes looting dungeons and castle cellars. The aim is to gross out the opponent to the point where he or she flees in disgust, hopefully leaving behind any gold pieces, jewels, health kits and rare weapons.

This skill among all others is the one most likely to backfire on the user, so much practice and perseverance is needed. We have gone to the effort of writing a brief How-To manual as well.

How-To Manual


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I. Things needed:
  1. A cobweb, preferably with its disgusting owner still on it.
  2. A strong stomach.
  3. The attention of your assailant.
II. You must be face to face with your adversary who might, or might not, be too big or too tough for you to handle.
III. With no sign of hesitation, gulp down (not just eat, chew, etc.) the entire cobweb (and if available the large spider along with it).
IV. Stare at your opponent, as if you didn't just eat a cobweb.

Best case scenarios

  1. He's so disgusted that he loses interest in you.
  2. He vomits.
  3. He runs in utter fear of what else you might be capable of.
  4. You vomit and the smell is so bad, he loses the will to fight you anymore and runs away, because of said odor.


Level 1-10

  • Ability to gross out an opponent to the point where they at least miss their swing with their sword/axe/pointy weapon of choice.
  • At this low level, the skill is very prone to backfire, so use with care and always carry a spill kit.
  • For the low-end user, we suggest ingesting just the cobweb only. Chewing on that spider may lead to extremely unwanted effects !

Level 11-20

  • At the more intermediate levels, this skill bestows the user with a powerful field of revulsion, able to send even the most battle hardened enemy fleeing.
  • Note that Cobweb Gulp is less likely to backfire at this level, but only marginally so.
  • The user must still exercise great caution with the skill, especially if aiming to chew on that spider. We suggest practicing by eating tequila worms.

Level 21-30

  • An advanced hero adept at Cobweb Gulp can not only ingest large cobwebs along with their noxious spiders, but is also relatively immune to the effects of doing so. We see very little backfire at this stage.
  • This level of the skill will always send an enemy running - gasping for air and retching mightily - leaving behind valuables and soiled undergarments.
  • The only provison of using Cobweb Gulp at this level is that the user must have undertaken an advanced Health and Safety and Dangerous Goods course.