Beer belly

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Skills of Godville
Beer belly
BeerBellySkill.jpg
Type ⚔️Combat
Description Unknown

The Beer belly skill is more prevalent in male heroes than females.[1] This skill is dependent on a heroine's drinking frequency and consumption capacity when visiting towns. Therefore, this is the most preferred skill for which to need training; most heroines are continuously pursuing higher achievement in this skill whether they know it or not.[2]

Offensive and Defensive Uses

The beer belly skill allows the heroine to develop a stomach that looks not unlike she is hiding a watermelon under the shirt. The inflated abdomen offers both attack and defense potential. As an offensive combat skill, the beer belly can be used for "belly bucking."[3] Impact causes blunt-force trauma, as well as the possibility of knocking the enemy over. A high-level beer belly skill can also give the user the power to shake the ground as she walks, causing opponents to loose their footing and fall down.

Used as a defensive skill, the beer belly affords the user a layer of protection on the abdomen. Strikes directed at the midsection of a heroine using this skill will have a chance of deflecting the blow entirely. Even attacks that are not deflected by the beer belly will do 25% less damage due to the shock-absorbing power of the engorged gut.

Effects

Beer Belly in action (inaction?)

Level 1-5

The heroine will have a "pooch" in her belly, a tiny bulge, which is barely even noticeable when she is wearing a bikini. This affords minimal offensive and defensive usefulness, but also doesn't impair the heroine's chances with the shop owner's attractive offspring.

Level 6-10

The heroine will be able to "pinch an inch" of fat around her waist, but it does not really hurt the monster in any way. The greater girth can be intimidating to smaller monsters, and will definitely have everyone around the water cooler gossiping about how the skill-user has "really let herself go."[4]

This hero is modeling skill level 16.

Level 11-20

The heroine can "grab a slab" of fat, intimidating the monster slightly. Weaker attacks can be deflected by the increasing rubberiness of the abdomen at these levels. Cannonballing into a swimming pool will cause a loss of 60% of the pool's water.

Level 21+

The heroine has a round, protruding belly thanks to alcohol consumption. They can use it to push, shove, hit, slap, or move the monster out of the way, sometimes taking the creature's breath away. Missile attacks to the midriff will bounce off harmlessly. The ground trembles when the heroine stomps her feet.

References

  1. Possibly sexist, but also true.
  2. "They're all in here, all hours of the day and night, training for their so-called "beer belly skill," like that's not something they just made up!" -- Anonymous Godville tavern worker.
  3. https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Belly%20bucking This is a thing.
  4. At least, that's what we heard from Janice in Accounting...
JanuWiki 2019
Monsters
Lagers Ale-chemist 🍻 Barbeerian 🍻 Beer Cub 🍻 Beer Golem 🍻 Beer Mugger 🍻 Beerburglar 🍻 Beerkat 🍻 Beerserker 🍻 Beerwolf 🍻 Boartender 🍻 Brewpid the Reindeer 🍻 Diet Sprite 🍻 Drinkerella 🍻 Extra Dry Djinn 🍻 Methylated Spiritualist 🍻 Red Bull 🍻 Tea Rex 🍻 Tequila Mockingbird
Tigers Basement Cat 🐱 Bureau-cat 🐱 Fat Cat 🐱 Meowntain Cat 🐱 Neferkitty 🐱 Photocopycat 🐱 Punk Panther 🐱 Weakest Lynx
Bears Bear Minimum
Oh My! Adminotaur 🏋️ Boozerker 🏋️ Godbuster 🏋️ Thug-of-war 🏋️ Wraptor
Other Articles
Artifacts Bar tab 🍻 Beer-battered beer 🍻 Beer-scented soap 🍻 Bottle of beer from a wall 🍻 Bottle of domesticated beer 🍻 Bottle of holy ale 🍻 Can of ambrosia 🍻 Exclamation pint 🍻 “Free beer” ticket 🍻 Instant beer tablet 🍻 Pint of no return 🍻 Strange brew 🍻 Vanishing pint
Equipment Ancient cork 🍻 Awkward paws 🍻 Bear arms 🍻 Beer goggles
Quests Brew a storm in a teacup 🍻 Sit in a tavern and write fake diary entries
Skills Beer belly 🍻 Lion belch
Taverns All Inn 🍻 The Battle Toad 🍻 Caravanserai 🍻 Progress Bar 🍻 The Rumor Mill 🍻 The Sword & Sandal 🍻 The Whinery