502 Bad Gatekeeper

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Monsters of Godville
502 Bad Gatekeeper
Malus bellus catulus "Huic Ostiarius"
Class Feline
Habitat Laptops.
Description Deadlier than you can imagine.

The 502 Bad Gatekeeper (Malus bellus catulus "Huic Ostiarius") is a gatekeeper monster who tends to fall asleep while on duty, allowing the hero to gain entry.

Ecological Niche

The 502 Bad Gatekeeper is the only known natural predator of the Godville Administrator. It appears to become so involved in the pursuit of its prey that it ignores all else. This has led to heroines reporting sightings of the chases all over Godville, and a particularly memorable occasion when a 502 Bad Gatekeeper took down a Godville Administrator in the middle of the main square of Los Adminos. Residents cowered behind doors and window blinds as the titans struggled, and as the victor dragged its victim back out into the wilderness.

In one of those stunning reversals that sometimes occurs in nature, the Godville Administrator appears to have discovered that the 502 Bad Gatekeeper is delicious in turn, and appears to have gained the advantage in the hunt.

Spawning Grounds

502 Bad Gatekeepers spawn in locations fittingly called "bad gateways." The largest of these once existed on the site of the town Bad Gateway, and may have been instrumental in the initial settlement of the town as a form of weaponized habitat loss. Gatewegians still tell stories of 502 Bad Gatekeepers, sometimes offering sightseeing trips to current bad gateways.

Subspecies Identification

There are several subspecies of 502 Bad Gatekeeper, and telling the difference between them becomes fairly easy once a hero or heroine can provoke them to vocalization:

  • If it yowls: This subspecies originates in a swampy bad gateway and can purr, but practices hunting on toads and frogs. It is very nimble. Beware of small, venomous claws.
  • If it roars: This subspecies originates in a plains bad gateway and cannot purr. It relies on a pride-style hunting strategy. Situational camouflage is very good.
  • If it yawps: Run. Now!



  • Looks too cute to disturb.
  • Makes heroes look twice, slowing them down.
  • Will quickly move into action once awoken.


  • Eats a lot of tuna.
  • Very ticklish.
  • Tends to chase any red lights, giving the hero a chance to escape.
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