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~This page is a work in progress sorry and okay it just sucks come back later~

~PS if anyone has any handy formatting templates for infoboxes that look better than mine that'd be nice~

~I may or may not make a separate hero page. May is very likely~

Deities of Godville
Hero Keleicea
Personality Virtuous
Gender Male
Final Chronos

The Chronicles of This Guy

Extended Version note does not include the much superior tale of his almighty goddess

"These are the details of how the hero Keleicea rose to greatness.

“Orphaned at a young age, Keleicea was taken in by the faithful priests of the holy temple of Miracelle (unfortunately still wooden bricked), goddess of Light, located in the great city of Godville, in the street where all the other temples are. He was taught Light magic and trained the many arts of temple cleaning, in the hopes that someday he may take the place of the priests which he lived under.

“Needless to say, Keleicea thoroughly failed in all his trainings. He preferred to play-fighting with other children on the streets rather than studying the pronunciation of symbols of power, and admired famous heroes who slew terrible beasts, rather than the priests who were quick to pluck out and heal the less famous heroes who failed to slew the terrible beast. Even in his teenage years, his head was full of idle fantasies, in which he was a mighty warrior, capable of defeating monsters and protecting fragile princesses. Occasionally, he would daydream about who his mother and father might be.

“The temple priests, of course, grew tired of Keleicea so, when he was legally old enough to live independently, they kicked him out under the pretense of allowing him to do what he had always wanted to do. Thus, Keleicea set in his heart to become the greatest of heroes and immediately signed up for the first quest he laid eyes on, grabbed whatever rubbish -10 weapon he could find, and set out toward unknown lands…

“Some time during Keleicea’s journeying, he began to feel rather lonely and homesick. After all, he walked day and night through areas far from anything he knew, surrounded by nothing but the hostility of monsters and occasional trolls. There was a gaping hole within his heart, which he failed to fill with beer. Then, on one return to his beloved temple, he had a brilliant idea, inspired by his inbuilt coding. ‘Why not get a pet?’ The priests had a pet, a giant golden slug, said to be the sacred symbol of Miracelle. Unfortunately, at that time, giant slugs could only be found sold as delicacies, not pets. Keleicea could only return to the wilderness, alone. That was, until one day, while he was resting, battered and bruised, a Santa Claws quietly came up to him and began licking his wounds. Surprised that it didn’t straight out pass out drunk, Keleicea decided to adopt this little bugger. ‘Alright, a pet! I’ll call you Pinkie Pie!’ Well, not quite, since ‘Pinkie’ wasn’t recognised by his dictionary and his goddess refused to let that name have anything to do with pies, he settled for the name Pinky.”

Notable Quotes

“This remote control thing isn’t working out. I think I’ll work on taking over your soul.”

“Um…you DO get smarter later on, right?”

“All your gold is belong to me.”

“Sometimes I feel more like your personal cheerleader than a goddess.”

My Amazing Brilliance

07/30/14 01:43PM I really hope that, one day, if I keep doing what I’m doing, I will figure out what the hell I’m actually doing.

07/01/14 02:17AM I’ve been furiously stepping on this crack for the last five minutes and nothing’s happening to the monster’s back.

06/27/14 12:35PM %hero_name% has defeated the %monster%! {He|She} claims %gold% and…why am I speaking in third person?

06/23/14 08:05PM As I gazed into my glass of beer, the face of a beautiful woman appeared, begging me to %quest%. Well, who am I to question what my beer tells me to do.

05/05/14 09:07AM Ran out of Action Points. Heading back to town to refill.

05/01/14 09:17AM Stupid vulture! Stop circling over me!

04/24/14 12:54PM Staring intently at the counter, wondering if he/she is missing something obvious…

04/05/14 01:42PM A unicorn walked into the bar, sat down and began to chat to the bartender. Decided I had had enough to drink and left.

03/03/14 09:53PM Saw a bunch of woodland animals congratulating a turtle which had just crossed what looked like a finish line. Turned around and went back to roasting a rabbit I’d caught.

02/22/14 03:02PM Saw a sign outside a shop that read “Get you’re armor polished here.” Someone had scribbled “*your” on the bottom.

(quest) 02/20/14 10:20PM “pull a puppet’s strings”,,"",""

(artifact) 02/15/14 11:47PM witch-doctorate certificate,

01/26/14 01:16PM What an incredibly detailed and realistic painting of … oh, wait, it’s just a mirror.

01/13/14 11:59PM Casting a line to fish for compliments…

12/24/13 02:35PM They say good things take time. Great One, if I take more time finishing this quest, I’m sure to get a better reward!

Catergory: Gods