Talk:Harvest Moon

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This week’s featured topic: Pets (part 1)

Other useful links:

  1. The HM Blog
  2. The HM Website
  3. Learn About the Tourney
  4. Our Town Influence
  5. Our Forum
  6. The HM Day Spa
  7. Digging Advice

Post-apocalyptic edition #9

Pets (part 1): How to Catch a Pet

Let’s go pet hunting!

Many believe pets can be chosen, this is not the case (unless you can arena or arrange for a spar every time your hero meets up with an undesired pet and watch them 24-7 or kill the hero when you can’t). For most of us, pets are chosen by the hero at random until you get to the final pet, the Philosoraptor, which is the current only listed pet for the Level 74+ heroes. There are rumors of the Dreaded Gazebo being a high-level pet, but it hasn’t yet been seen at any level.

Want to help your hero catch a pet? After they hit level 18, keep their health high, don't punish (and don't miracle if you own a temple) while fighting tameable monsters. The average level for capture of the first pet is level 19, so don’t be discouraged if your level-18 hero hasn’t tamed one yet.

Next week: Pets (Part 2): Pet Skills

At Home with Bella Stewart

Queen of evil
Advice from the Mavin of the Macabre, the Mistress of Mystery, our very own Empress: Bellatrixie The Strange!

It's a new year, and we all know what that means: new year's resolutions. Yes, even an almost-perfect evil goddess such as myself can use a little improvement, so here are my top ten resolutions for 2013.

10. Get more exercise by kicking more puppies in half, walking to the bar instead of being served by evil gnomes, and hitting that punish button more often.

9. Drink less water, more Dark Flame.

8. Cut down on carbs, i.e. eat open-faced kitten sammiches and restrict breakfast visits to Blue Feather to only once a week.

7. Work less, delegate more, and still take all the credit. I mean, isn't that what co-leaders and personal assistants are for? Hey, Lady Darkness and Budapesties, c'mere!

6. Instill more discipline in my hero, Galldemort. The next time he dies, I think I'll just let him rot for awhile. That should help his hearing.

5. Redecorate my temple. All those sacrifices have taken their toll on the carpets, and the blood stains just tip off...er, I mean scare away the worshipers.

4. Make an appointment with Dr. Frank-n-furter for hair and makeup tips. No reason why evil can't be beautiful. And we all know my hair is a fright.

3. Bribe Charon into finally giving me that boat ride across the Styx. He's such a tease!

2. Bring Dogess over to the dark side where she belongs.

1. Forcibly drag Hairplug4men back to Harvest Moon and reunite him with his sock.

Next week: How to deal with the winter doldrums!

Down in the dumps about your home or temple's decor? Send GodBellatrixie the Strange  (aka Bella Stewart) your questions directly or submit them to any member of the newspaper staff.

Get To Know a Deity

Might be the one on the right...
Here we sit down weekly with a Harvest Moon warrior and find out what makes them tick. This week’s Deity is our guild co-leader, Czarina and Counselor of the Moon: GodLady Darkness 
  • Q: What is your favorite salty snack?
  • A: There is no better salty snack than fear and popcorn.
  • Q: What GV pet would you like to have?
  • A: Sadly, my favorite pet is my Heffalump, Sven. We've been together so long, I can't imagine playing without him.
  • Q: Do you have any hidden talents?
  • A: My hidden talents are secrets. If I told you, they wouldn't be hidden.
  • Q: What color underwear are you wearing?
  • A: I should say a lady never tells these things, but I feel charitable tonight. My undies are emerald green.
  • Q: What are your hero’s marketable skills?
  • A: Marketable skills? What are those? Seriously, who is afraid of 'Fanned Fingers' or 'Pocket Hypnotoad'?
  • Q: Do you get emotional using Encourage when in times of crisis?
  • A: What is this 'Encourage' you speak of? I have 'Punish' and 'Evil'.

If you have a burning question for Harvest Moon's Deities, please submit them to the staff. Thank you!

Special Announcements

So the world didn’t end...

Now you have an even better excuse to come hang out and join in the evil-fun in our forum! Pop in to say “Hi!” Enjoy some Dark Flame, have a sammich, put your feet up and make yourselves at home! See you there!

All shopped out but deeply disappointed you didn’t get what you wanted from Santa? Return those unwanted items and spend the money wisely! Spend it on Harvest Moon guild merchandise! Visit http://www.cafepress.com/harvestmoonmerchandise and get the hoodie, t-shirt, or coffee mug you wish Santa would have brought in the first place!

Famous HM Heroes This Week

#717 GODVILLE TIMES Day 956 g.e.
EvilSnoopy - 59th-level adventurer, member of the Harvest Moon guild, with the motto “For worlds end!!!!”, stands at the 17th position in the pantheon of destruction under the vigilant supervision of the goddess GodEvilSnoopy . He's asking someone to arrange a date between Burger King and Dairy Queen and report the results via carrier pigeon.
#725 GODVILLE TIMES Day 964 g.e.
Girl Friday - 78th-level adventurer, member of the Harvest Moon guild, with the motto “Blood Moon Devourer ☾”, stands at the 105th position in the pantheon of savings under the vigilant supervision of the god GodOmicod . The heroine has no distinctive features to date; however, she promises to get some before her next appearance.
#726 GODVILLE TIMES Day 965 g.e.
Izrafel - 67th-level adventurer, member of the Harvest Moon guild, with the motto “☾ Blood Moon Angel ☽ ”, stands at the 155th position in the pantheon of mastery under the vigilant supervision of the god GodJan Serafin . The hero has no distinctive features to date; however, he promises to get some before his next appearance.
Ideabox News:
#728 GODVILLE TIMES Day 967 g.e.
Will71653 - 75th-level adventurer, member of the Harvest Moon guild, with the motto “Hi there! =D”, stands at the 19th position in the pantheon of savings under the vigilant supervision of the god GodWill71635 . The hero has no distinctive features to date; however, he promises to get some before his next appearance.

Member of the Week

God of Electricity: Shocking!
Get to know a newer member of Harvest Moon! This week's guest is: GodGod of Electricity  Take the time to get to know him a bit... please? We’re pretty sure he needs lessons in the Live eviL philosophy.
  • Q: How did you choose HM?
  • A: I met GodRaniLada  in the arena, she added me as a friend, and suggested I join HM.
  • Q: Where does your heroine hide her coin purse?
  • A: In her bra
  • Q: Name some things that you and your heroine have in common.
  • A: We both are similar in that we both have never been truly good or truly bad. Also we both love to write but we don’t have any documented chronicles. We both love our friends.
  • Q: What is your favorite voice command?
  • A: My favourite voice command is "heal with herbs! strike with smite! pray with love!" coz there’s kind of a chance he may do anything depending on what the Great Random is listening out for!
  • Q: What toppings do you like on your kitten sammiches?
  • A: My arms because kittens are made for hugging and loving and squeezing! (but not too hard....)

What would you like to know about your Harvest Moon guild mates? Submit your questions to any member of the Weekly Harvest staff!

Classifieds

Selling Evil Since Day 898 g.e.
Still Wanted: Only 76 more friends needed to help me reach 1st Rank Coaching achievement. Friends, enemies - I don’t care! Make an alt! I can’t keep this up much longer! Call 1-866-SPAR-W-ME!
Free to good home: 8 PUPPIES, 3 weeks, fully house trained, some assembly required. First come first served at the Harvest Moon guild hall.
Evil heroine likes kitten sammiches and long walks in the graveyard, seeks goodie-goody arch-nemesis for lifelong rivalry. CALL 1-800-FOE-4-YOU
For sale: Shiny, new weapons of distraction, I mean destruction! Guaranteed to catch their hero (and maybe yours) by surprise when least expected! Call 1-800-FIGHT-ME today! Disclaimer: seller is not responsible for any damages of any kind to anyone.

Doctor Frank's Advice Corner

An evil queen
Dear Dr. Frank,

My hero flatly refuses to take care of their pet. Sure, he said he’d feed, bathe and walk the scaly beast... and he does, sometimes. But revive the silly pet? Noooo... that’s asking too much! Why do I have to do all the heavy lifting around here? Doesn’t my hero know how much easier this would be if he’d finish my temple? Can’t he skip just one wild night at the bar? At this point, I’m wishing he’d adopted a pet rock.

Signed, I might write a country song.

Dearest “_ _ M B O and Dumbo was his name-o,”

Did you know that it’s easier than ever to revive pets? Sure, without a temple it’s difficult to punish your hero to low health to follow the “quest completion” method of reviving (hero completes quest, walks into Godville with low health and enough gold/loot to sell to revive), and the arena can work but it’s risky as (obviously) you have to win to get/keep the gold you need to revive the little guy. The hero won’t waste any gold under these two circumstances.

There is another way. DIG! If you’ve noticed the knocked-out pet early enough in the 60-hour countdown, with the new-ish boss monsters and improved digging results, you can collect a significant chunk of change! Without quest completion or arena, I’d recommend having twice the amount needed to revive (the pet’s level times 450 is the maximum amount of gold required). Following this method, to revive my level 19 pet, I need 8850 gold coins. If I collect about 17000, I should be able to revive in almost any town even after wasting/saving half of it.

Good luck!

~Dr. Frank

No question is too great or too small! Submit your questions for GodDoctor Frank-n-furter  to any member of the staff. No invites? Send them via email to drfrank.hm@gmail.com.


Special Thanks to our staff writers: Bellatrixie the Strange, Cecceticat, Doctor Frank-n-Furter, Jarlbank, Lady Darkness, Lady Shadows, Magic Merlin, Syrocko and The Other Gods. Staff photographers: Bellatrixie the Strange, Kure. Issue #1 Issue #2 Issue #3 Issue #4 Issue #5 Issue #6 Issue #7 Issue #8