Coffee Mugger

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Monsters of Godville
Coffee Mugger
Capulus clepta
Coffee mugger by Amrutha the immortal.jpg
Class Unknown
Habitat Near coffee fields, coffee shops, and coffee makers
Totem for Knights of the Coffee Table ⚜️ 
Description Steals coffee for the greater good

The Coffee Mugger(Capulus clepta) is a coffee enthusiast criminal cup monster. It steals coffee beans from those who wish to monopolize coffee for themselves. After taking its share from the loot, it then distributes the rest to those who are in dire need of caffeine. Whatever is left would be given to townsfolk to share its passion for coffee to the public.



Nobody is sure how the Coffee Mugger came to exist. Some speculate that it mutated from radiation. Some say that it is a failed experiment by lazy wizards who wish to create a self-brewing coffee cup. This experiment was said to have failed because of the laziness of said wizards.

There is also a rumor related to the latter theory. It is said that the lazy wizards have assistants that they neglect and keep working for hours on research. These assistants rely on their meager salary and free experimental coffee to feed their families. They worked continuously with only caffeine to keep them awake. By the time they were able to produce results, the lazy wizards have moved on from their coffee cravings to the new milk tea craze. The assistants are said to have resigned and taken their research, promising to make the neglected project profitable.

While milk tea was the new public craze, many coffee-loving nobles took the opportunity to monopolize coffee and make it a luxury product, making it hard for the poor (ex)assistants to continue their research.

Nobody knows what happened to them after that. The researchers stopped leaving their makeshift lab. And that's that.

The Coffee Muggers' existence was noted after said events.


A drunk hero once literally stumbled upon a Coffee Mugger raiding a coffee bean storage. The hero thought it would be his best death yet, as he would die after partying in a warehouse of something fragrant, and collapsed, out of drunkenness or fear, he won't say.

He woke up in a weird place, thinking that he died (again), but soon realized that death doesn't cause hangovers. Beside his makeshift bed was a cup of freshly-brewed coffee. The scent cleared his mind, so he decided to drink it. His senses cleared up and his hangover wasn't as bad as before. What a wonderful drink! He never thought that any other drink would be worthy of him.

As he was going back to the city, the scent of coffee made its presence known. There, he saw the weird monster that didn't kill him last night. He followed it, thinking it was going to steal again. But that was not the case; it was giving the loot away. It throws bags of coffee beans to stumbling drunkard heroes and heroines, some hitting said hero/ines, but even then, it was clearly not attacking them. The Coffee Mugger also leaves some bags in front of houses it passes by.

The hero followed the monster until the sack its loot was gone. He followed it even after that. Nearing the Coffee Mugger's lair, it confronted the hero, ready to attack. The hero then explained that he only wanted to thank the Coffee Mugger and was awed at the monster's generosity. The monster froze with a weird expression on it's face. Having said what he wanted to, the hero internally thanked his Deity and fled.