A place for the bumbling heroes of the undead kind.. Our diet exists of small children and large brains(hard to find among the denizens of Godville.), and cookies! The Lich Zombie gave you a common goal. And guides you as you wander aimlessly eating monsters that are generally smarter than the random travelers you run across!
The history of the Zombie Horde:
These parts of the history are made by the unknown, and probably eaten, former librarian of the Horde. These annals are written in the 'Great book of the Lich' and are to be learned flawlessly by every member alive, since they contain clues about the location our great founder might be. Sincerely, Librarian 2.
Letter sent to the current Guildmaster, 12 December 2013
The history only goes back a couple of hundred decades. Zombies are just as stupid as their human hero counterparts, some zombies being long-dead heroes themselves, and they can't find the old tomes anymore. The Lich Zombie came into power and vowed to change this however. And a dark cloud loomed over the guild. Tired of watching some of his close shambling friends be slaughtered and maimed by hero and peasant alike. He decided to do away with the agreements and truces the hoard once held. Seeming how the mortal, and less lasting heroes had long forgotten the truces once signed between the guilds.. Everyone once ignored or protected by the truces became fair game. And what was left of the withering hoard fed greatly on heroes and peasants! Their ranks swelled with new followers and interns converted to their cause once they saw the world from the eyes of the undead!
"Walking a mile in my corpse.." The Lich Zombie proclaimed, slamming his rotting fist upon the table! And then, he taught and formed an elite unit! A unit of child eating brain feasting bumbling idiots wearing ridiculous disguises... In which could be seen through rather easily. But no matter! The denizens of Godville aren't that educated. They just dismiss the walking husks that wear blooding clothing stolen from victims as chaps that take a bath possibly more often than most! (yuck right?)
The life of a zombie is hard. And even harder for the one undead individual, that stands in leadership of the zombie hoarde. He has the I.Q. Of a flea and the attention span of a fly. Better than most! Heck, he is so dumb he doesn't even know it's him I'm talking about right now!
Right... The history. So not to long after his first campiagn, his god watching and guiding him slowly but surely to help him meet his goals. His god, much smarter than he ofcourse and simpithetic to the cause of his creation. So he ordered his servant to build a temple in his name. The almighty and all knowing Wulfman relished in the thought of gathering worshippers. If anything he probably contemplated his hero converting his own guild followers.
Towns and villages finally wising up to what was going on decided to locate and destroy what was left of the guild. Heroes, peasants, and the admin creatures alike began on the assault! Clouds roared, thunderbolts flew. Wulfman was bowling with the other gods, explaining the thunder clearly enough. And soon as the gods game finished they began searching for their heroes. The horror and devastation of the battle that took place during their bowling tournament had them shaking their heads and clicking their tongues in disbelief. Just like the heroes to take off and do something stupid the second ones back is turned.. (like that odd one with the pasta strainer on his head that tried to take that spegehtti bowl from the gaping maw of that gruesome.. Guess how that ended? So, the guild was in shambles. The guild was destroyed. The Lich Zombie nowhere to be found. Until a year later when the hero Eusebia, impaled The Lich Zombies head on his sword... Swearing The Lich Zombie tripped and fell onto it. (very plausible..)
"I'll be back!! I always come back!!" he screamed, interupted by his jaw falling on the ground and having to pick it back up and reattach it.. Then he exploded into a cloud of nasty smelling dust..''
The Page is currently under heavy updating, please send your suggestions to Phoenix258, or ask my email ingame. Please dont change the page without noticing me first.
Thank you, Angela Sedai.
Credit goes to Spode for the template. And for alot of things. Appreciate your work Spode. ~Wulfman