Weakest Lynx

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Monsters of Godville
Weakest Lynx
Lynx infirmissimus cibarius
Class Tigers
Habitat Anywhere it can stretch out and look adorable.
Description A deceptively cute and vulnerable member of the Felidae family.

The Weakest Lynx (Lynx infirmissimus cibarius) is a monster renowned for its helplessness. This is at once its greatest vulnerability and its most dangerous trait.

How to Recognize this Monster

All lynxes, even ordinary ones, are known for the comical tufts on their ears, their endearingly huge paws, and cute stubby tail. The Weakest Lynx deploys these to great advantage in a fight.

Many a champion has been undone by thinking of this monster as simply a very large kitten. Even the most hard-hearted of heroes will melt when a Weakest Lynx rolls onto its side, exposes its belly, licks one great paw, and begins rubbing its ears.

The monster's sheer cuteness wrings a series of increasingly loud "Awww"s out of its opponent. This continues until the hero is desperately short of breath. At this point, the Weakest Lynx need only tap its opponent gently with one powderpuff-gentle paw to deliver the fatal blow.

Tips for battle

The best defence against the Weakest Lynx is to cover one's eyes so that its adorable appearance cannot work sinister magic. At this point, the monster will snort indignantly and go off in a huff.

Another defence is to keep certain attack pets that are immune to the monster's charms (notably a Sun Dog or Biowolf).



  • Soft, soft, soft fur... so soft...
  • Those ears, tho!!!
  • And the paws look like BABY KITTEN PAWS THEY ARE SO HUGE OMG!!!!1!1


  • Easily distracted by catnip.
  • Terrified by vacuum cleaners and balloons.
  • Really, really, really dislikes getting wet.
JanuWiki 2019
🍺  Lagers and Tigers and Bears, Oh My!  πŸΊ
Thanks to all participants
βœ” Complete article β€’ βœ’οΈ Stub β€’ πŸ“· Picture required
Lagers Ale-chemist βœ” πŸ» Barbeerian βœ” πŸ» Beer Cubβœ” πŸ» Beer Golem βœ” πŸ» Beer Mugger βœ” πŸ» Beerburglar βœ” πŸ» Beerkat βœ” πŸ» Beerserker βœ” πŸ» Beerwolf βœ” πŸ» Boartender βœ” πŸ» Brewpid the Reindeer βœ” πŸ» Diet Sprite βœ” πŸ» Drinkerella βœ” πŸ» Extra Dry Djinn βœ” πŸ» Methylated Spiritualist πŸ“· πŸ» Red Bull βœ” πŸ» Tea Rex βœ” πŸ» Tequila Mockingbird βœ”
Tigers Basement Cat βœ” πŸ± Bureau-cat βœ” πŸ± Fat Cat βœ” πŸ± Meowntain Cat βœ” πŸ± Neferkitty βœ” πŸ± Photocopycat βœ” πŸ± Punk Panther βœ” πŸ± Weakest Lynx βœ”
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Other Articles
Artifacts Bar tab βœ” πŸ» Beer-battered beer βœ” πŸ» Beer-scented soap βœ” πŸ» Bottle of beer from a wall βœ” πŸ» Bottle of domesticated beer βœ” πŸ» Bottle of holy ale βœ” πŸ» Can of ambrosia βœ” πŸ» Exclamation pint βœ” πŸ» β€œFree beer” ticket βœ” πŸ» Instant beer tablet βœ” πŸ» Pint of no return βœ” πŸ» Strange brewβœ” πŸ» Vanishing pint πŸ“·
Equipment Ancient cork βœ” πŸ» Awkward paws βœ” πŸ» Bear armsβœ” πŸ» Beer goggles βœ”
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