Town features

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Along the winding Godville Road, every town has one or two interesting features. The Map of Godville will helpfully tell you what the features of any given town are. Those features may be any of:

Parties and pensions

  • Lavish parties and good savings: In these towns, whatever your hero or heroine does, they will do to excess. Bar tabs grow loose and fast; and yet at the same time, when moved to set money aside for retirement instead, a larger portion of gold will be saved for the future. An aura of abstinence will discourage a hero from doing either. Lavish parties and good savings towns include Beerburgh, Bumchester, El Herado, Herolympus, Herowin, Los Adminos, and Newland.
  • Cheap parties and bad savings: A mixed blessing, these abstemious towns are low on both revelry and trust of financial institutions. Visiting these towns discourages your hero or heroine from parting with their gold for either instant gratification or long-term stability. For Gods and Goddesses with younger heroes, not yet completed their temples, who haven't established a retirement fund, these towns are a blessing. Cheap parties and bad savings can be found at Bosswell, Last Resort, and Lostway.

Healing and praying

  • Quicker healing: Increased competition between medical professionals in these towns has led to an overall improvement in public health services. Wait times are shorter, therapies more effective, counterfeit medicines less abundant, and 'sanitary' is a word that some healers have heard at some point. Less time is lost here recovering health. Fast healing towns include Bumchester, Dogville, Healiopolis, and Los Adminos.
  • Slower healing: These towns occupy a high point in the landscape, and by a combination of relativistic time dilation effects and the inexorable pull of gravity draining medicine, skills, and blood away, it takes longer to regain health here. These unfortunate locations include Godvillewood, Monstro City, and Monsterdam.
  • Better prayers: Sweet, clear air blowing through the streets of these towns increases the amount of oxygen that gets to the brains of your heroes and heroines, improving the mumbled gibberish that usually passes for prayers to be slightly more coherent and audible. Prayers and rituals performed at these towns will increase your Godpower more than usual. These spiritual towns include Dogville, Godvillewood, Last Resort, Newland, and Quirkytown.
  • Weaker prayers: Eddying magnetic fields surround and suffuse these towns, pulling and tweaking at the various bits of shrapnel, snapped off blades, surgical equipment, and metalophagic gold coins that can be found in every hero and heroine's body. The constant tickle distracts from sacred prayers, reducing their efficacy in increasing Godpower. These cursed towns include Beerburgh, Deville, Los Demonos, and San Santos.

Buying and selling

  • Good trading: These market hubs of Godville are known among all heroes and heroines as great places to offload loot in order to make a hefty profit. Consequently, whenever heroes venture into these towns, they haggle and argue with the traders until they get a good price, as they are already expecting one and so will not accept anything lower. So the traders from these towns have suffered from their kindness in giving a few heroes a fair price. Now every hero and heroine expects to make a fortune with whatever junk they bring in, and will accept nothing less! Send your minion to one of these towns after a dungeon haul for some gleaming gold. Good trading towns include Anville, Herowin, Lostway, Simpletown, and Tradeburg.
  • Bad trading: Home of some of the sleaziest, scummiest traders in Godville, the traders of these towns will have naive adventures leaving with less cash than they went in with. These dobadders exist as part of a cartel designed to scam the socks off even the most astute of heroes, or leave them without feet at all. Feet fetch a high price in the black markets of these towns after all. Avoid these towns when endowed with great loot, or see your champion attempt to build a temple out of tarnished copper instead. Bad trading towns include Quirkytown and Trollbridge.
  • Cheap stuff: Low on gold from melting everything into a brick? Hoping to save a little something to help revive a pet? These towns will do the trick. These are some of the industrial centres of Godville where all manor of things are created. Without any cost of shipping, everything is close to smithery prices! Healing items, gold bricks or equipment purchased in the buying phase will help leave a hero with lots of money to waste on more alcoholic pursuits. Cheap stuff towns include Anville, Los Demonos, Tradeburg, and Unspecifiedistan.
  • Expensive stuff: Traders used to dealing with the elite (and rich) populations of these towns will be unlikely to give outsiders any special discounts. Due to the wealthy populations here, sales are rare and price tags rarer. If you have to ask, you probably can’t afford it. But that won’t stop a hopeful hero or heroine who will blow all their cash even faster than normal. Healing items, gold bricks or equipment purchased here are more expensive than usual. Expensive stuff towns include El Herado, Egopolis, and Healiopolis.
  • Cheap skills: An abundance of grandmasters has left many without a job in these towns. Simply walking around the street, an adventurer will find a few sitting on street corners, advertising their willingness to train into others their hard earned skills for petty cash. Not wanting to ruin this great opportunity, most heroes or heroines won’t even tip.Training in skills is less expensive in these places. These towns include Dessertown, Herolympus, Monstro City, and Trollbridge.
  • Expensive skills: The smarter grandmasters have moved out of places with overabundances into more secluded places and have set up lucrative training schools, charging outrageous fees for even simple skills. The few grandmasters here spend all day meditating in gold plated temple-castles and will charge seekers of knowledge a few for even a consultation. Training in skills are more expensive in these places. Bad luck. Expensive training towns include Egopolis and Simpletown.