Sit in a tavern and write fake diary entries
Anyway. It could be a love note. Could be a "Free Beer" ticket. Hell, could be a deposit slip.
But I just know if I unfold it and look it'll be one of those ridiculous quests from you-know-who. She who might be obeyed.
Well bugger that. Pretty sure She doesn't know about this spare diary. So I'm just gonna write the usual stuff in my normal diary while I sit in this sunny beer garden and drink. Cheers, me!
Not likely to be any gold bricks just sitting around in a tavern. But... ugh, I'm really not in the mood to work.
Actually... there's plenty of idiots in here just begging to be separated from their gold bricks. βA fresh prophet comes down with every rain of blood,β ain't that what they say?
No problems then. I'll finish this pint and head inside. Gotta be some drunken idiot in there who'll bet a gold brick or two on... whatever. Woo!
Shome lil' twerp from... Where wuzzit... Necks Tayshen? Bet me a gold brick she could 'eadbutt the table fer longer'n I could. Din't take long 'fore the bouncer came over'n shouted at ush to stop, n' the idiot did! So I won!
Went double or nothin' an' since the bouncer tecknickly grabbed 'er first I'm up 3 bricks!
Thississ workin'! Gonna try m'luck at 'nother tavern.
I wash up 'nother 3 bricksh! Then shome lil'... lil'... shome lil' twerp bet me 2 bricks I couldn't fin' out howter turn a gol' brick inta pinta beer. Sho. Sho. I tried, smashed four 'r five pint glasssez 'fore gave up. N', n', y'know what the... the lil' twerp did? Took two'v mah bricks n' bought two roun's fer the whole Goddesh-damned bar wiff'em.
Goddesh-damned lil' bashterd.
Sho then the twerp took m'other four bricks'n then I took both the twerpsh beers n'said "Tahdah! Givus'em back" n' then I took two back n' the twerp hit me in me 'ead wif 'nother one n' I 'it the twerp wiv mine an' a very large gen'lman ver' kindly invited me out'v the tavern in'a thish pile'v 'orse plop.
Oh, plop. Gotta write sumfing in th'other diary. Shorry, Shoul Shupreme.
I've woken up in... Oh Goddess, in a pile of horse dung, behind some awful dive. Wait... How did I get gold bricks? And why is there blood on them? And on... Oh dear Goddess, no wonder I have a headache. Did I get hit in the head with a gold brick?
And... Oh, bugger. My quest.