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Guild Page: MILLIWAYS 

Milliways is the Restaurant at the End of the Universe. It’s a wonderful restaurant where you can relax, enjoy excellent food washed down with Pan-Galactic Gargle-Blasters and watch the universe explode in living color.

That’s not us.

MILLIWAYS is a guild of gods who have been sadly burdened with heroes of sub-par intelligence. Once we were carefree; immortal beings blessed with wit and vision, calculating the infinite while composing the symphony of the heavenly spheres. All of us were lured by an ad for adventure and the opportunity to mentor a promising sentient being. What we got were alcoholic primates with a predilection for violence and an inability to learn. And we can’t get home.

Some of us have toiled on, encouraging the hopelessly unteachable, trusting that good will prevail and creating righteous heroes that wander the land in an effort to do good deeds. Many more of us have simply snapped under the strain and have taken to punishing our heroes for simply surviving a good night’s sleep. These “heroes” wander the land committing unspeakable acts of simplistic drunkenness.

Forgive us our trespasses – those of us that have any wits left are at our wits’ end. Those of us that have lost our wits have gone to the dark side. Frankly, the cookies are really good.