Boots of hasty retreat

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Equipment of Godville
Boots of hasty retreat
Worn 👖Legs
Durability Unknown
Description Causes heroes to jump to conclusions.

Unlike it's well-known cousin, the Boots of Haste, the Boots of hasty retreat do not allow heroes to travel long distances in just a few steps.

Instead, the Boots of hasty retreat increases the wearer's innate impatience and judgmentalism. When equipped, heroes and heroines alike become more likely to take rash actions, form prejudiced opinions of others based on the first few seconds, and become easily angered.

Although advertisers claim that these boots can be found in stores near you, shops are likely to be out of stock due to impulse shopping.

  • WARNING: May cause wearer to jump to conclusions.