The Bharata Guild was formed on February 18, 3102 BCE, at the end of the great Bharata War, which began the Kaliyuga, the current Age of Misfortune. This period of universal calamity is prophesied to last 432,000 years, and is currently evident in such unspeakable travesties as the crisis in Syria, the Congressional debt ceiling debate, and the unstoppable rise of Jersey Shore. The Guild was established to unite the forces of good and evil, to rid the world of elevator music, and to offer the heroes of Godville a healthy alternative to their apparently insatiable alchoholism. Due to being described as "harmless" in the Rum-Runner's Lesser Guide to the Galaxy Third Edition, a protest known as the "Bharata Humbug" was held for one weekend which was sucessful in changing the description to "annoying, but harmless". During the protest the guild's productivity hit an all-time low and beer sales an all-time high, however no correlation has been established between these facts.
Popular activities of the Bharata Guild include:
-Untying and retying the Gordian Knot;
-Listening for the sound of trees falling when no one is there to hear them;
-Trying to levitate chocolate cupcakes;
-Staring at goats;
-Making light of crude behavior in front of guests.
Each member of the Bharata Guild does everything in his or her power to hasten the end of the Kaliyuga by at least 2-3.75 weeks. At this rate, they are highly optimistic that it could end as soon as 426,874 years from now, or just before Jersey Shore goes off the air.
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