Bad Gateway

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Towns of Godville
Bad Gateway
Bad Gateway.jpeg
Home milestone 502
Map code BG
Known for Lavish parties and good savings

Although years ago this was a good gateway, the town fell in with a bad crowd and went bad. There are nightly parties lasting until the elders come out and yell to go to bed, and rarely is there a full classroom in Bad Gateway. Youthful Gatewegians know about saving up money though, as their parents rarely give them cash for their smashing celebrations.

As an aside, Bad Gateway is reported to have the most fascinating countertops ever! Needless to say, this claim was made while the claimant was terribly drunk.

Culture

As it fits into the culture of the Greater Godville Metropolitan Area, Bad Gateway has a distinctive set of myths and legends, and is known to be a source of the subset of heroes and heroines known as ninjas and samurai.[1] Sake flows in Bad Gateway as freely as beer does in other towns.

Bad Gateway residents and expatriates generally refer to themselves as "Gatewegians," and commonly have a high tolerance for noise, alcohol, and tipsy hijinx. However, visitors and tourists are asked to please observe the common courtesies when visiting this fair city, and make sure to shut the gate behind them.

Notes on Location

Bad Gateway is considered by road planners to be slightly oddly positioned along the spiral, having set itself precisely at milestone 502. Though the history of the town is lost to the mists of time, Bad Gateway appears to have been built on the largest spawning grounds of the 502 Bad Gatekeeper.[2] A panel of cryptozoologists and civil engineers that convened in g.e. 2902 has advanced the theory that Bad Gateway was settled in the earliest known instance of weaponized habitat loss, in order to reduce the population of 502 Bad Gatekeepers.

Known Hazards

Bad Gateway has been identified by the Unspecifiedistan University Lawn and Turf Extension as the epicenter of Godville's present Moonswine infestation.[3] Tour groups are advised to be on the look-out for any unscheduled full moons and take precautions against attack. Hunting parties are advised to be prepared to haul home a lot of bacon.

Footnotes and References

  1. Travelers who cannot afford to travel to Bad Gateway to experience the culture themselves are advised to pay a visit to a local franchise of The Battle Toad, which honors and encapsulates an exaggerated take on Gatewegian culture.
  2. This monster is the only known natural predator of the Godville Administrator.
  3. Dr. Gracias, Polly. A Survey of Cryptozoological Pests and their Impacts on Residential Landscaping.' Unspecifiedistan University Press. Unspecifiedistan, 3049 g.e.
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