Ancient Demon

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Monsters of Godville
Ancient Demon
AncientDemon1.jpg
Class Demon
Habitat Hell, Swamps, and Dark Forests
Description A cranky old demon

The Ancient Demon (Daemon antiqua "ancient demon") is a boss-monster that may be encountered at the end of the mini-quest "Die another day."

Heroes often ask how old is the Ancient Demon? Well:

  • The Ancient Demon is so old that he remembers when the Dead Sea was only sick.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that his birth certificate is expired.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that his memory is in black and white.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that his birth certificate is in Roman numerals.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that Jurassic Park brought back memories.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that his social security number is 1.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that he knew Burger King while he was still a prince.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that he knew Mr. Clean when he had hair.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that he called the cops when David and Goliath started to fight.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that when he went to school, there was no history class.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that he recalls when the Grand Canyon was a ditch.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that he walked into an antique store and they kept him.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that when he goes to antiques auction, people bid on him
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that he is mentioned in the shout out at the end of the bible.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that he went blind from the big bang.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that when the first God said let there be light, he flipped the switch.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that the candles cost more than the birthday cake.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that when he first ran the 100 meter dash, they timed him with a sundial.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that when he reads the bible he reminisces.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that he remembers when rainbows were black and white.
  • The Ancient Demon is so old that he lives in a museum instead of an old folks home.

Attributes

Strengths

  • Extremely Wise
  • Cranky
  • His wrinkles alone have been known to petrify heroes in fear
  • His wrinkles' wrinkles have been known to petrify petrified heroes in fear
  • Ugly

Weaknesses

  • Old
  • Slow
  • Has a really bad case of Arthritis in his left knee


Mini-Quest Progression (Artifact Award)

  1. Help an angel earn its wings (Angel’s feather)
  2. Find where angels fear to tread (Invite to hell)
  3. Calculate a snowball’s chance in hell (Wet pants)
  4. Die another day



Boss Monsters
Aboveground Archnemesis Arrestocrat Awkwarg Beerkat Broadbandit Centourist Cholestroll Headhaunter Jaguardian Megaphony Obituarian Pundemonium Ragnarokker Snowman Spirit of Halloween Terminator T-34 Wraptor
Dungeon
Lvl 1 Bagstabber Bluffalo Boozerker Catastroflea Cementalist Dungeon Sweeper Escargolem Flowsnake Hypnogriff Keyborg Minotourist Nachomancer Optimystic Plundertaker Quasidodo Salsamander Scaretaker Shyborg Sighborg Telepony Turmerisk
Lvl 2 Aftermoth Appetitan Archetypo Blamethrower Buzzkiller Detrimentalist Exoskeletor Flashmobster Gastronaut Glitch Doctor Grimelord Hazmatador Hellevangelist Killdebeest Magnum Octopus Omnipoet Tombcat Underminer Uranium Slug Warmongrel
Lvl 3 Adminotaur Afterlifeguard Ark Enemy Bosstradamus Difficultist Ducktator Dungeon Keeper Flawyer Godbuster Hangoverlord Hyperbully Megahurtz Obscentinel Oxydjinn Satyrant Shamaniac Spelun King Stalactitan Thug-of-war Tinkerhell Tubercolossus
Mini-Quest Ancient Demon Drowned Captain Level Boss Mad Clown Vegan Cannibal Wherewolf
Underground Alpacalypse Alpha Mole Bossferatu Dragonandon Giga Byter Heromnivore Jack Lantern Moleosaurus Mount Dracula Oreoboros Overtaker Placeboss Pumpkinhead Rootbear Squirmisher Terracotta Worrier Vertigoat